


To Begin Again

by minstreltroubadour



Category: Outlander & Related Fandoms, Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2019-04-30 19:56:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 26,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14504364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minstreltroubadour/pseuds/minstreltroubadour
Summary: Jamie passes through the stones on Beltane to 1968.





	1. Someone's at the Moor

**Author's Note:**

> My take on how Jamie arrives in the 20th century! This is going to be a showverse AU with a little bookverse for some details. I’ve not been deep in the Outlander fanfic world so I am not sure if this AU has been written before (let me know if it has!)
> 
> This has been queued and written sporadically in the past months but in honour of JAMMF's birthday today, I thought I'd post the small lot I've managed to write. 
> 
> Hope you like it!

The stones were screaming and Claire could hear them trying to pull her in. She knew Brianna can hear them as well as she tried to shield her ears from the dreadful sound. It was hard not to look at it – the stone. After all, this is the scene of the crime and the heart of a dream. If Brianna weren’t here, there was nothing stopping her from touching it and hope to all that is holy that it takes her to the right time where she can finally be living. They were walking away from the stones when Bree called her mother and they stopped. 

“Is this the last place you saw my father?” the question pulled Claire back from her own thoughts. It was not the first thing she had thought Brianna would ask but it was about Jamie and she couldn’t help but smile and feel a little bit more at ease in this transition.

“Yes” Claire replied without hesitation, a statement of fact.

“I believe you. I don’t understand it but I believe you.” Bree said. “No more lies. From now on, I only want the truth between you and me, alright?.” Brianna said, looking at her mother eyes, willing to trust her honesty as she continues to process all these new information about her life.

Claire gathered her daughter’s face in her hands. “Oh, you’re so like your father.” She paused and let the moment sink in - the first moment of understanding, of acceptance, of peace Claire prayed so long for. “Yes. Only the truth from now on” she said, gathering Bree in her arms in a tight and crushing hug.

 As they pulled away from each other, Claire can still hear the faint screams of the stone. To resist the temptation, She and Bree walked further away from the stones to control its pull and settled on a lone log in the moor. Sitting side by side, Bree took her Claire's hand, sighed deeply and leaned her head on her mother’s shoulder as she let all hurt and pain that has happened in the past weeks fade away.

 -

“We have to look around for evidences, in case Roger comes back with the police.” Bree said after she had calmed down a bit down. Claire turned to her daughter with a confused look on her face and Bree clarified immediately. “The police won’t know what to look for _exactly_ but you do. We’ll just scour the area and see if we can save something, anything, that will hopefully make this more _normal_ , I guess?” 

 _What could it hurt?_ Claire thought as she agreed to Bree's suggestion. They did need to try and help the poor guy Geilis has chosen to be her sacrifice. As a fellow time traveler, Claire felt a small guilt and responsibility to what her friend has done - murdering a man for a lost cause two hundred years in the past can never be justified. They stood up and began to look around the vicinity of the standing stones. Bree looked within the stones and Claire focused on the outside of it.

“Bree! Be careful and don’t touch that big stone in the middle or any stone for that matter, just don't touch anything!” Claire yelled making sure that her daughter heard her. What followed was a hummed reply.

“Not unless you want to go somewhere in time.” she muttered under her breath and chuckled. Why and how can she laugh at this time and situation, she had no idea but it was quite funny and she welcomed the positive vibe.

“Mama?” Bree called questioningly after a while.

“Yes, darling?” Claire didn't look up and continued looking around and away.

“Someone is here” Bree said flatly.

“Yes, darling, that’s her husband” Claire sighed, why is Bree stating the obvious is beyond her but she let it go. The faster they look around, the faster she'll be able to just sit, talk to her daughter again, tell her the etory from the beginning and hopefully start a new life and relationship with her - one with no more secrets and lies.

“No, Mama.” Bree said. “This isn’t her husband.”

 Claire was jogging back up the hill to inspect Bree’s new find. “Another one? My god, she killed two people?” _Bloody Jacobite!_

 “I am not so sure this one is dead, Mama.” Claire halted beside Bree and she gasped so loud the buzzing stilled and seemed to stop.

“Uhhhhm..” Claire could not form words, her eyes focused on a man on the ground. She swallowed a huge lump in her throat she hadn’t realized were building in her astonished and dazed state.

“Is he who I think he is?” Bree knew right away who he was even before she called her mother over. She wanted and needed the shock to flood through and over her first if she wanted a real chance to deal with all these sudden, life-changing events and come out okay. She’d recognized him immediately, after all, it was almost looking at a mirror, as her mother said, because he did look like her. More than that, she’d seen the “Wanted” signs at the reverend's house and her mother drew him for her in the last days she’d been sharing stories about her life in the 18thcentury. Bree tried very hard to keep up an image of him, to imagine a portrait of her father to keep with her always, in the hope to finally understand herself – and her mother - more. But now, he’s miraculously here in 1968 and her mother’s reaction is just as she expects a normal person would react if someone they haven’t seen in twenty years suddenly shows up – shocked, confused, happy all at the same time. Bree knew she would need to be calm one in this knowing her mother can’t.

“Mama?” Bree tried to break the reverie her mother has apparently fallen into but Claire didn’t hear Bree’s question. Claire’s mind is running a thousand heartbeats per second, as if she’s just been shocked by a defibrillator and is slowly coming back to life, to her real life, a life she wanted to live.

Mindlessly, Claire moved away from Bree and knelt to the ground as Jamie Fraser stirred awake.


	2. An Unlikely Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jamie passes by and through the stones.

Jamie Fraser was making his way back to Lallybroch for a visit. Jenny had insisted he show up at their gates on his birthday and make himself known to his family who misses him dearly for a little celebration. 

Living in Edinburgh for the past months wasn’t all that bad and it sure is a whole lot better than dealing with Laoghaire everyday and continuing to sink down in a marriage that was doomed from the start.

He was able to start a printing business – opting for a new weapon against the English. With all the letter stealing they’ve conspired during the war, he learned a long time ago that the pen can be as might, or even mightier, than a sword.

To anyone who knew him previously, one might think that being a printer was less than being a soldier but it was not to Jamie. Any weapon he can wield, he can and will make do to the limits of it (even beyond the law!) and he will make it important work. Moreover, lucky for him, too, he loved books and being able to print them and publish them, read them before anyone can, brought him a little bit more peace in his new chosen profession.

Of course, printing isn’t exactly the most profitable way of living. With an estate to look after and lasses to care for, he found other modes of living. So besides being printing, he is also a smuggler and a traitor, both of which, he didn’t mind being branded these days, as it fills him with added sense of duty and a purpose to fight for. To continue to fight for Scotland, to fight for Claire and his child, to fight for a future and cause he gave everything up for.

Traveling back to Lallybroch, as always, he takes the long route back. A route that passes through Craigh na Dun, where he spends at least one night in. He prepares a rather heavy meal, one that will last him the duration of spending time with memories of Claire and imagining the life of their bairn. He often wonders how Claire would react to the life he’s lived – Would she approve? Would she understand? Has she read about him in the future? Arriving at the foot of the hills, he let his thoughts float away and moved to go on about his real reason for visiting.                                                                                                                                                  

He sets up Claire’s plaid on the ground, the one she left before passing through the stones. Craigh Na Dun was the only place he thought it deemed safe to display it with the ban on tartans after the war. It has been one of his constant possessions no matter where he went. Even Laoghaire knew better than to touch it.

With the plaid laid down, food set up, fire lit up, Jamie settled down for a long night ahead. It was the 1stof May in the year of our Lord 1766.

“Sassenach, do you ken that I am to live to be five and forty today?” He said to start. “Do you ken that I lived?” the second question came as a whisper as though she would hear it and he would be smacked to the head.

 _“Lord, that she and the bairn are safe”._ The thought quickly passed and quickly prayed as he continued the imaginary conversation he and Claire could be having right now.

“I am headed home right now, to Lallybroch to see Jenny, Ian and the bairns. Well, they’re no so much as bairns, now, being auld and such but I canna think of them less else as such” Jamie smiled and continued. “It’s been 3 months since I left for Edinburgh and she wants me home to celebrate my birthday with them.”

“I remember you telling me how birthdays go in your own time. With all the cakes, your wee balloons was it, and singing a song - I forgot how it goes and I probably couldna sing it anyway.” He recalled with a laugh that quickly but the memories had turned the moment to somber.

“I miss you always, mo nighean donn. I think about ye all the time.” Jamie mused to himself, a ghost of a smile cracking.  “I remember your beauty, your wit, your wee foul mouth (he knew he’d get a smacking for that), just…you. I know you’d be blushing under your hair wi’ me saying all these wonderful things about you and it still wouldna cut the fraction of my love for you”

Jamie sighed deeply, both in happiness and sadness - happy to be feeling his love for Claire, unwavering still, if not growing, these last twenty years and a pang of sadness as he touched the faded scar in his left hand that bore her initial.

“I remember everything we’ve been through and constantly imagine the life we could’ve had with our bairn, Claire. How happy we would be living in Lallybroch, my pride as I put our lad or lassie atop of a horse for the first time and you’d shout at me to be careful, -

Jamie was interrupted by the sudden rush of wind, followed by muzzled sound of pain on the other side of the cliff stone.

 _Claire! Could she be it? Could she have come back to me?_  

His breathing stopped. He couldn’t help holding it in. Maybe he didn’t want this hope to fade away too soon yet. Maybe he thought if he held it long enough it’ll not make this a dream.

“Claire?” He called out as he slowly stood up from the ground to check and see who’s come.

“Ughhhhhh…” came a rasped reply from the other side of the stone. He remembered Claire saying that traveling through was a rough journey.

Slowly, Jamie took a step to take a closer look. With each step, his emotions are in battle between managing expectation and jumping for joy.

_It could not be Claire._

He tried to balance his physical and emotional state.

_Or it could be her as well._

With his senses in almost equilibrium, he remembered to take caution. Maybe this traveler is dangerous, he thought to picking up his dirk in caution of an enemy. 

Quietly, he took one last step and touched the stone hoping to use it as leverage and shield from the new arrival.

Everything just went black and the only thing he saw was pure darkness.

 -

Motion sickness has always been Jamie Fraser’s downfall. But falling into naught in what seemed forever made his innards whack and his entire body sought to find solid ground to land on.

Falling into this abyss was probably the second worst moment of his life.  There was nothing to be seen, nothing to touch yet the sensation seemed to go infinitely and indefinitely and the screaming was just endless. Jamie had thought that he’d got stuck between time, and that he might join in the cry of people calling out for someone to find them, to pull them.

 _Claire_. He had to think of her and their child – it’s his only way out, if not to survive.

 _Claire_. His heart, his soul, his breath.

 _Claire_. The love of his life, his only reason for living.

Suddenly, he felt the cold chill of the evening on his back along with the smell of smoke around him. The grass was damp – thank god! – so his fall wasn’t painful. If he was honest, the pounding in his head was more annoying than lying in cold, soft grass. His eyes were closed as he tried to gain control of his body again.

With his senses coming back one by one, he can now hear some voices in his surroundings. Hearing the buzzing and the new sounds around him, Jamie Fraser stirred awake – _Oh god, where did he land? What year is this?_

“Mama?” He heard someone – a woman speak. He tried to pry one of his eyes open and his blurry vision took its time to clear out but he saw her - her red-headedness first then her face.

“Mam?” He tried to voice out but only a soft sound came though that cannot compete and be heard over the small sounds of nature. _She was here, he saw her! A dhia, is he dead?!_ With whatever strength he had, he raised his right hand to reach for his mother but no one touched him. He closed his eyes shut again.

Claire knelt to the ground unsure if anything else is real at the moment and if this present time could still pass for real life. She slowly reached out to touch the face she longed to see for twenty years halting just before contact was made.

The week has been the second craziest days of her life. From not uttering his name for twenty years and now, it’s his name she keeps on saying over and over, whether from telling Bree and Roger stories, to, now, guiltlessly thinking of him, freely speaking to him as if he were there, asking for his help in dealing with their daughter and now, the man in question is literally in front of her, flesh and blood and real.

“Jamie?” Claire said as the heavy tears in her eyes bid their time to fall across her cheeks.

 _Oh, this must be the afterlife,_ Jamie thought. First, seeing his Mam, now, hearing Claire’s voice – there was no other explanation. Jamie squirmed, shut his eyes and closed his fists so hard in wishing to contain the moment. If it were his last memory before he is completely taken away to another place – this would be enough.

“Jamie!” Claire called out again, a little louder now. She can see his contorted face and she knew it wasn’t because of pain but one of fear. She knew because she knew him still and she had the same feelings since Bree found him –  that if Jamie won’t open his eyes for the fear that she wasn’t there, Claire doesn’t even want to even blink in the fear that he would disappear.

But still Jamie won’t budge. He laid there still as a rock, he might’ve passed as dead.

 _This wont do_ , Claire thought. With enough courage to gamble reality on, she grabbed his left hand with her right, aligning 20-year old scars that would know its twin in a heartbeat.

Jamie flinched, eyes scrunched closed, he breathed a heavy gasp upon the contact but instead of shying off, he tightened the hold of her hand. He knew it was her the moment she placed her hand in his. He could feel their scars – a sacred mark, a statement of promise and lifetime devotion. He could never forget the shadow of her touch all over his body. Only her. _“If this is to be my last moment of knowing, let it be this”_

“Open your eyes, my love” Claire said without hesitance. Adrenaline was shooting through her veins that she had no time to think twice of what she was doing or going to do. At this point, she’s just letting her emotions overflow towards the person it calls to for the past twenty years. She placed a hand on his cheek, willing him to come to her. “I am here” she paused to give him time to process. “Really here. Do not be afraid, Jamie. Open your eyes.”

His body and soul was overwhelmed. First, Claire’s voice and then her touch. So real and it felt so good. He knew the feeling but after not sensing it for a long time, it felt foreign to him at first. He continued to hold tightly on to her hand and allowed her soothing words comfort him and make him brave – as she always did.

She said she was real and she was there. He had to believe it because he loves her and she loved him and there was really nothing else to do and no where else to go. Slowly, Jamie opened his eyes and he focused on a pale, white, Englishwoman with wet amber eyes and hair covered by sort of scarf.

Tears immediately fell from his eyes unexpectedly. With his other hand, he reached for Claire’s hand that was on her cheek.

_Holy God, she is real and she is here._

Claire.


	3. Of Lost and New Loves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jamie, Claire and Brianna make sense of what just happened.

“You’re alive” Claire said softly in her stunned state. “Jamie, you lived! How - ?” she repeated, mostly to convince herself of what was in front of her, then went silent, moving her hand all over him to prove to herself that the man before her eyes was, indeed, warm flesh and blood.

“Claire?” Jamie stared at her, still unbelieving on what he was seeing. “Sassenach, is it truly you? Are you real?”

Claire saw both the pain and hope in his eyes but she felt thankful to utter the next words that came out of her mouth, “Aye”, she said with a teasing smirk.

In a second, Jamie pulled her down to him and crashed their mouths together in a searing, reassuring kiss. It was just like when Claire decided to stay in the 18thcentury and she surprised Jamie with her decision. Rough at first, they pulled on each other, wanting to feel so much in the moment and then, slowly, they both relaxed to each others embrace as they went down to a steady rhythm of just kissing and caressing each other until they absolutely needed to breath.

Claire pulled away and settled to press their foreheads together. “Jamie, I -” she softly muttered but she found that words were not adequate enough to covey what was happening.

How do you describe the feeling getting the love of your life back? How do you shout ‘thank you’ to the universe where time and space bent itself and gave you the most unbelievable miracle of all? How do you say to the person you love the most that after nearly two decades of separation, that you are still and whole-heartedly devoted to them? Claire was at a loss but thankfully, Jamie interrupted and spoke first.

“I saw you so many times,” Jamie began, his eyes closed again. “You came to me so often…When I dream, sometimes…When I was in a fever, I was so afraid and so lonely, I knew I must die.” Tears were both springing from their eyes, coming together as it fell to Jamie’s shirt or to the cold, muddy, ground. “Whenever I needed you, I would see you, smiling, your hair curled around your face – but you never touched me.”

Claire exhaled, her face was so close to Jamie’s she was sure he breathed her and her him - seemingly reviving and giving each other life again. “Do not be afraid. There’s the two of us now” she whispered to his ear, remembering yet another beautiful memory of theirs. She felt Jamie’s smile from under her, knowing he was remembering the same thing.

As much as she wanted to lie and stay in Jamie’s chest forever, Claire knew there are more suitable place for that activity.  “Can you stand up? Let’s move over there... We’ll be a little bit more, ahm, comfortable there.” she requested as she rose to get off of him. Jamie nodded and propped himself up, the dizziness from the time travel long gone now.

Claire reached out a hand and he immediately took it, lacing their fingers together, and walked away from the hill. If Claire was being honest, the other reason she wanted him to move away from the stone is that she was afraid that if he accidentally touched it again, that it’ll take him back. Petty reason but she wasn’t going to take any chances and as selfish as it may be at the moment, she won’t allow that to happen.

After a few steps down, Jamie sat down on the grass, his back supported by the large trunk of log that was in the clearing. Claire followed after and sat beside him – neither one willing to let go of each other’s hand. She leaned into him and caressed her cheek in his wide shoulder. “I can’t believe you’re here – really here. How are you alive, Jamie?” It was the question circling in her mind the moment she saw him lying on the ground. “What happened?”

She felt him stiffen for a moment but in true Jamie fashion, the emotion was quickly masked away before it became too obvious. Jamie raised Claire’s hand to his lips for a light kiss, after which, he wound it around his neck, gathered her in his lap and invited her to a bone-crushing hug - welcoming home the part of them they’ve longed for most and the let separated years pass them by.

“Do you want to hear the story now? Twenty years is a long time, Sassenach.” he whispered.

She released a soft giggle and nuzzled in his neck, desperate to get closer, and sighed. “No, later”

No words were needed to be uttered, just pure movement, same feelings and so much love coursing through them saying _“We’re here, we’re together and it is enough.”_

- 

Brianna held back, letting her mother and _father_ take care of each other in the moment. She just stood there on the side, looking at them, observing them.

First, her mother’s bold touch, followed by a deep, emotional kiss. Then came Jamie’s unhinged declaration and now, they were hugging and she figured, will not be letting go of each other anytime soon. They have completely forgotten about her and was oblivious to her presence in their intimate reunion.

Moreover, the sudden realization that this is the first time she’s seeing her _real_ parents interact brought Bree to a slight embarrassment. She felt like a voyeur, staring at them, but at the same time, she couldn’t look away. It was all surreal. This is a man who her mother didn’t know was alive, hasn’t seen in twenty years and she acts like this love sick teenager all of a sudden as if no time had passed – as if they just picked up where they left off since they last saw each other.

 _Is this what love really looks like? Real and true love?_  

Bree never had a reason to doubt her mother and Frank’s love for her. They cared for her, her needs, they were present in all the family day activities, was in every PTA conference and school performance. They always showed up together and to the outside world, that defined a good and solid relationship. She never saw or heard them fight either. With all that, she never had a reason to question how good or bad their marriage was. To her mind, as long as they went home to their house, they were okay and a family. And they seemed fine and happy, focused on her upbringing and supportive of each other’s career - just how she thought life should seem. However, reminiscing about Frank and Claire as an adult brought her more clarity – the distance and civility they’ve displayed for her sake, all for her sake.

The more she thought about it, the more it hit her. They never touched each other or held hands – not at home and especially not in public. And in public, they kept a respectable space between them as they walk the streets or in one of their office functions. When she’s with them, they put her in between them, holding her hand on each side. When they ate, one parent always sat next to her – Bree can’t remember a time they sat side by side that their sides _actually_ touched.

Their sleeping arrangements weren’t impressive either. Bree remembered so many holidays and birthdays, she’d sneak in their room and see them sleeping with their backs to one another, the middle spacious enough for her to crawl into. When she entered college, they changed their king size bed for two individual beds, reasoning that Frank needed a more specific mattress for his back that her mother couldn’t stand sleeping in. Normal, reasonable - she just nodded, accepted it at face value and never suspected a thing.

Bree felt a somber cloud fill her. Had they chosen to live a miserable life just for her sake? Were they ever happy the past twenty years? 

She sneaked a peak again on her mother and _Jamie_ (god, what will she call him?). She didn’t know Jamie _yet_ but she knew her mother and Bree had never seen her mother that relaxed and content in all her life. As a parent, medical student and doctor, she has come to know that her mother was always on the edge, always rigid, always alert, always thinking two, three steps ahead of what she should do, always on the go. But now, in Jamie’s arms, there was a peace in her face that was new to Bree. No crease on her forehead, her body was slack, and Bree could hear a faint snore coming from her. Her mother will not be bothered and if she will be, she can only be awakened or bothered by Jamie. Claire looked like nothing mattered in the world right now except where she was in the moment.

Talking to her mother about the story of her and Jamie’s relationship these past weeks, Bree observed the change in Claire’s demeanor and personality. She was free with her words, smiling a lot, never holding back, there’s a light in her eyes when she spoke his name, she spoke proudly of how her father was a hero but more so, how he was as a laird, brother and husband. Claire and Jamie were beyond devoted to each other, they surrendered themselves, who they are, to the person they chose to be with forever and that devotion holds true then and now.

Her mother told her every story she could remember from their life together and every after story, Bree couldn’t deny the love Claire has for this, then, mystery man and the, then, mystery man to her. But, apparently, life _(the universe…a higher being?)_ had other plans and this mystery man is no longer a mystery - he was 1968, alive and cuddling to her mother.

Bree never thought that she will ever get to meet him but here he is here now. _How would one Jamie Fraser react to her? How would she react to him?_ Huffing a resigned sigh, Bree found no reason in delaying the obvious. Nervous as hell as she was, she was an adult, she can emotionally handle this. _Right? This was her family after all. The only family she has left._

After talking some courage into herself, Bree checked her hair, wiped her face with her hands and walked over to her _parents_. She’s about to introduce herself to her _real_ father.

- 

“Sassenach,” Jamie called out after a while. 

“Mm?” came Claire’s soft reply.

“When I woke earlier, I…I think I saw my mam” he shared. “My vision was blurry but I saw her long red hair and eyes…”

 Claire gasped and her eyes widened as she was reminded of a certain someone – an important someone – Jamie has to meet. In the heat of the moment, she momentarily forgot about Bree. Where was she? Claire lifted and turned her head around to look for her daughter. _Dear God, I hope she hasn’t touched the stone!_

  
“Bree!” she shouted in the moor, willing her fiery-haired daughter to reveal herself. Claire whipped her head around to look for that familiar sight and as she turned to one corner, she found her - _their_ \- daughter walking closer towards them and towards an inevitable introduction. 

_Here we go._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took a while but I hope you like it. I love writing this story and I've draft up some couple of plots for the next chapters. Hope you continue reading it! As always, comments and suggestions are always welcome! 
> 
> P.S I think I should set like a weekly schedule on when to post these like I see other fanfics do! :)


	4. The Introduction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jamie meets Brianna and Roger.

As his daughter walked closer to them, her stride reminded him of a memory from the day after he let them go.

_Snow fell over the Culloden Moor in a dark and bloody evening and Jamie Fraser stirred awake. He was alive – barely, he thought. He looked around the battlefield and saw the hundreds of lives lost in this hopeless cause, he wept for the souls whose destiny lied in this war. He closed his eyes and willed death to come and take him too._

_But it wouldn’t come. As hours went by and Jamie was well aware of his apparent, life. Still, he was weak and wounded and could not get up even if he tried to, and now, it was a waiting game of who will come first – death by the cold or someone rescuing him.  He looked around and saw no soul in sight, and then he saw a vision of his wife, Claire, walking towards him._

_Could she have returned to him? Could she have come back and waited for the aftermath of the battle? Could she have, yet again, disobeyed my orders to return to safety for the sake of our child for me?_

_His heart swelled and hoped, but as soon as she was close enough to touch and he reached for her, she was gone. He can almost believe she was real but when Rupert’s face came into view, the dream was gone. He, then, felt so much pain, crushing pain - not from his wound, but from his broken heart and he wanted nothing else but to die in the knowledge that the sacrifice of the loves of his life was not in vain. He closed his eyes to surrender to death, again, but his clansmen wouldn’t give up on him that easily._

_Next thing he knew, in a string of luck (good or bad, he still couldn’t decide), he was on a wagon back to Lallybroch, Jenny pouring scalding hot water on his wound and then his life in isolation in the cave began._

The pain from the memory resurfaced but his feelings quickly changed when he saw her. He decided that it was all in his _good_ luck to have lived and now, to be in this time. Red hair, blue eyes, with ruddy curls, he couldn’t deny that the beautiful lass is his – his and Claire’s – a product of their love, the idea striking Jamie to the core. Everything they did, everything they’d done, everything they’ve been through, it was all worth it. She was here, alive and safe, and Jamie would endure everything again for her.

“I felt the same way the first time I saw her” Claire whispered as she stood to get up, Jamie following after.

“She’s beautiful, Claire.” Jamie said in wonder. Tears were in danger of falling but he immediately wiped them away, not wanting his daughter’s first memory of him to be crying. 

“She’s ours.” She replied as she slipped her arm around his waist and pulled his side close to her hip. Jamie, on the other hand, was completely transfixed by their child. As her words sank into him, Claire could feel him trembling with anticipation. He was nervous and suddenly, so was she. This was a moment she never thought would happen and no one can prepare any of them on how to approach this. But here they were and there was no stopping it.

Jamie put his arm around Claire and looked at her. “What did you name her?”

“Brianna. Brianna Ellen” Claire and Jamie turned to find Bree standing a couple of feet from them, directly facing both her _parents_ waiting for someone to continue the conversation.

“Named after your father, just as I promised. I added your mother’s name because, well, just look at her, you said it yourself, she looks just like her.” Claire said to Jamie. “Besides, those names belong together, I thought I’d honor them both and you by naming our child as such”.

Brianna felt a momentary lapse hearing and being referred to as “ _our child”_. The child they both prayed for, the child they both wanted, the child they loved enough to let each other go. Bree tried to mask her emotions by nodding to the brand new information offered. “I didn’t know that.” Bree said, deciding that she’d ask stories of them later.

Jamie, on the other hand, still stood transfixed and dumbstruck by the presence of his daughter.

Another silence fell and the only sound were from crickets and the wind. “Jamie?” Claire tugged at him.

“Hello?” Brianna waved a hand in front of Jamie’s face to bring him back from his reverie. Whatever nervousness Bree felt or should feel, was gone and was replaced with a feeling of charm, humor and tenderness by his _father’s_ reaction to her.

“Ah, dhia!” Jamie softly sighed. He leaned to Claire, in both support and nervousness. “I’m sorry, a nighean”

“You’re James Fraser, aren’t you?” Bree awkwardly asked– maybe she was a little nervous after all.

“Aye” He awkwardly replied back.

“I’m – I’m your daughter. I’m sure you can tell.” Bree tried to sound casual with a tentative smile played on her lips.

“Aye. Aye, I can” Jamie shuffled his feet, unable to say anything else. “My god, you’re huge!” a blushed crept over him as the words came flying out, thank God it was dark and none of his lasses saw how red he went.

Both women laughed. “And whose fault is that, do you think?” Bree retorted.

“Och no, lass. I didna mean it that way. Tis only, I hadna thought of you as grown. I had ye in my mind somehow as a wee bairn always – as my babe. I never expected…” words faltered as he raised his hand to lightly trace her features in the air. “May I?” Jamie asked and Brianna nodded. He released his hold on Claire and boldly stepped closer to Bree.

“Brianna” Jamie said as he tucked a stray hair behind her ear. It was different the way he said it. _Bree_ anah, that Scottish burr so pronounced. “Beautiful” he followed as he continued to trace her cheek and down to her jaw. Unexpectedly, Bree leaned into Jamie’s hand, feeling the warmth and heat in his skin, surprising herself that she couldn’t pull away from his touch if she tried - _not yet,_ as if her brain whispered itself to command.

A sniffle from Claire caused them to turn. Tears were freely flowing from her eyes and her face has the most brilliant smile they’d ever seen. “Don’t mind me” she said, noticing both of their stares. “I’m just…happy.” They looked at her earnestly as she wiped her face to no avail as more tears fell. “This – This is all I wanted” Claire gestured with her hands, pointing to them, pointing everywhere while she was in the highest of cloud nines.

Bree looked at Jamie and understood what they needed to do. Bree went to her mom and gave her the tightest of hugs. Jamie crept behind Claire and gathered both of his girls in an engulfing hug. Claire, on the other hand, just held on and let it all out.  – and in that moment, all was good and all was well.

-

Roger is driving back to the stones after making the anonymous tip of the crime to the police. He wonders what kind of story will be published on this “murder”, especially, when the killer, as a fact, will never be found. Would this be one of those unsolved murder mysteries you hear about in years to come with a lot of people having their own take of the story? It could be, considering the bizarreness of the situation but deep down, only 3 people will actually know the truth.

As a historian, this is the best _research-slash-adventure_ he’s ever been and will ever have. Unexpected as his guests are, he strangely didn’t find their story too weird or unbelievable. Maybe growing up listening to Mrs. Graham’s stories as a lad did have its perks.

Traveling back in time to actually witness history take place is every historian’s dream and now he is in the presence of one that can actually tell the truth – not assumption – truth of what really happened then. He immediately thought of Frank Randall and how much he has missed in his research if only he believed his wife’s story. How much his work would’ve meant more if he had those juicy details, stories or evidences, you cannot find and no one knows except his “time-traveling” wife. What an opportunity he missed because of his pride, probably jealousy and heartbreak.

He’s yet to tell Claire that he’s actually, probably, found James Fraser to be alive. He and Bree have been spending sometime in the Reverend’s attic and found the research he’d supposedly sent to Frank Randall many years ago. It mentioned of a Fraser officer surviving execution from the English army after the battle. Five Fraser officers are recorded in the books, four names are memorialized on a plaque in a church in Beauly, the fifth name left out, Roger was pretty sure, is Jamie’s.

Roger can’t wait to tell Claire. He hopes that the news will, of course, make her happy and lessen the tension between her and Bree. 

As he pulls the car to a stop and shuts down the engine, he begins the climb up the hill to look for his guests. The buzzing was still there but it was fainter now than when they arrived. The sun was rising but the color of the sky remained a magnificent shade of blue and violet that left the rest of the scenery a shadow still in the dark.

Arriving at the top, he saw Bree and Claire wrapped in the arms of a 6’3 giant of man. As far as Roger knows, there’s only one giant man allowed to hold them both like that and he is supposed to be in the 18thcentury.

 _Could he be? Could he have come through? What perfect timing!_ Roger thought.

Jamie saw him approach and quickly, he moved from Claire’s back to Bree's Front. 

“Who are ye?” he calmly called but the undertone of protection was still apparent. _Cause my family harm, I will not hesitate to dismember you._

Before Roger could speak, Claire intervened. “Jamie, this is Roger Wakefield. He’s the reverend’s son and we’ve been staying with him in his manse as his guests.” Roger extended a hand to Jamie and thankfully, he took it.

“Speaking of which, maybe we should all head back to house before the police shows up?” Bree suggested and off they walked down the hill.

Roger went down first, Brianna accompanying him. Claire laced Jamie’s hand on hers and asked “Ready?”

Jamie took a deep breath, looked at the tall stone and tried not to look back at what he’s leaving behind. He’s got Claire and his child now, everything he’ll figure out later.

“Aye, let’s go”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly had a hard time figuring out what kind of path I will lead Jamie and Bree to meet in this scenario. In the end, I decided that there will be hesitation but maturity will overcome it at the moment. There is still tension though and I'm happy to explore where they want to go after this! :) 
> 
> Hope you like the new chapter! As always, comments and suggestions are always welcome.


	5. The Issue of Semantics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jamie rides a car and Bree observes her parents.

“It’s just like a carriage” Claire explained as Jamie eyed the car intently wondering how such a contraption works.

Jamie was hesitant to even enter the car. Naturally, everything is strange to him. Thank God Claire was there because for sure he would have died trying to avoid the damn thing if he was on his own.

“How does it move then?” He asked back. 

“Well, in this century, they have already invented what they call a _motor_. It’s a machine that makes everything run like it’s the horse that pulls a carriage. You put fuel in the car then the motor uses it to move it forward” Claire tried to explain with as much analogy and understanding as she could.

Jamie couldn’t do anything but nod and agree. It’s not as if he has much choice. Though Claire has told him stories of how the 20th century was, it was different being able to see it in person. He decided then that he would have to learn the basics of this century as quickly as possible – just had Claire did when she stumbled to their century. It will be difficult but he will do it for her.

She was observing him – he was thinking too deep, the lines on his face in discussion then it relaxed as if reaching a decision. It’s the same face he had when he brought her to the stones the first time. _No,_ Claire panicked and yanked him out of his head with a tug on his arm before he got any funny ideas.                                                                                                                                                                                                     

“The car will be loud and the the city will be loud. You might get too overwhelmed but it’s nothing to be afraid of. I’m here.” Claire warned and assured Jamie in the event the bustle of the city overstimulates his senses too much too fast. One way or another, he was going home with her even if it meant that they had to walk. 

Bree and Roger already took their seats in the front and Jamie motioned for her to lead the way to the back of the car.

Roger warned Jamie when he was about to start the car just to be on the safe side. True enough, when the engine roared to life, Jamie squeezed Claire’s hand, first in shock and then in control. As the car began to move and the scenery changed, Jamie, slowly, relaxed in his seat.

“Come lay your head man.” Claire said to Jamie, who, again, smiled at memories of the past. “We’ve got a bit of a drive and I think you’ll be feeling the same here as you do in a boat.”

Jamie trusted Claire’s word and did as he was told. This was her world and her time, he knew nothing and would have to follow her instructions for the time being until he learned to adapt here in this century. He closed his eyes and leaned his head on her shoulder and unexpectedly drifted off to to a light sleep.

Claire couldn’t stop touching or looking at him. She’d never felt happier in her life since she gave birth to Bree. She loves her daughter but this miracle might even just trump that. She looked down at him – _god, he was still beautiful_ \- and their intertwined fingers and smiled a little bit more. Then, in a moment of unutterable tenderness and love, she leaned down and gave him a light, lingering kiss in the forehead and settled to lean against his frame and try to get some rest too.

As she drifted to to her own slumber, her mind seemed to wander on its own to a place she didn’t want to but need to confront soon. She knew that this blissful feeling is fleeting and temporary. The surprise of Jamie’s arrival will waive down soon enough and they will need to talk about the _real_ stuff. They were parted for 20 years and as sure as she was of Jamie, change was inevitable and they have a few more scars since they last saw each other. They would have to deal with what they have done in their lives at some point and not all of it would be pretty. But she had faith in them and they will come through this no matter what, that much she knows is a fact.

-

Bree couldn’t help but glance every now and then in the rearview mirror. Seeing her mother really happy was a sight to behold. Seeing her _real_ father in the flesh was beyond a dream. But if she was really being honest with herself, both those people at the back were strangers to her. 

It has only been a week since the truth of Bree’s paternity came out and she spent more than half of it screaming false at her mother. It was only today that she told her she believed her, minutes later she sees a red-headed man slumped on the ground, who turned out to be James Fraser, the man in question, now sitting at the back of a car with them in the 20th century.

She glanced again and saw her mother smile and place a small kiss on Jamie’s forehead. It was both terrifying and exhilarating seeing her like this - this new side of her Claire she’s seeing was a sight to behold. She’s more bold, more loving, more caring, just…more. This is the part of herself she’s kept for 20 years and surprisingly, Bree really likes it.

And then there’s Jamie. Her real father. The 6’3, red-headed, highlander her mother’s been in love with, the hidden secret, the unspoken name, for the past two decades. She wasn’t sure how to open up to him, after all, she’d just accepted him not long before they met. What would she call him? Not Jamie, that was too formal and almost disrespectful. Not _Father_ , that’s too distant and stern. Not _Daddy_ , that’s what she’s called Frank Randall all her life and she’ll not dishonor his memory by giving that name to anyone else, even if it was Jamie. Not _Dad,_ that seemed too English and doesn’t suit him in her tongue. She sighed deeply, maybe she’ll just ask him what he wants to be called.

Maybe it wouldn’t be bad to get to know them. After which, she can just decide whether to accept them or not – but she’ll make it clear that it will be her decision and in her own terms. It would take a lot of courage from everyone to make them tell their stories and hear out the _truth_. Bree needs to hear them and she needs to get to know them.

 _But did she want all these? Did she want to get to know these people? Did she want a new father? Did she want the burden of keeping this secret?_ That was not negotiable. She had no one else but her mother, now, her _father_ and this was her family, time-travelers and all.

Brianna was so deep in thought that she hadn’t realized that they’ve already arrived at the manse. If only she wasn’t startled when Roger touched her knee, it would’ve taken her a while to get a hold of their surroundings.

Fiona greeted them by the door and despite the early morning, she had breakfast prepared for them.

“I didn’t know when you’d be back but I prepared a small breakfast for you all and coffee.” She looked at everyone and raised her eyebrows to Roger in question as to the new guest they brought home.

“Thank you, Fiona. Uhm, could ye also prepare another bedroom, some towels and soap for our new guest?” Roger began to diffuse the situation. “Fiona, this is Jamie. Jamie, this is Fiona Graham”

Jamie and Fiona gave a friendly and respectful nod in acknowledgement of each other. Fiona went back inside the manse, followed by Roger, leaving the Fraser’s yet, again, on their own. Claire and Jamie went out on their respective sides of the car, both stretching as soon as their feet can elongate to their full height.

“I’ll just settle Jamie up in our bedroom, he could really use a little bit more rest but you three can enjoy your breakfast.” Claire requested as she rubbed her eyes and try to put some spirit in her still sleepy haze.

The changes in the room arrangements in the manse was obvious – she’ll be the one moving to the new room - but it didn’t stop Bree from at least, assuming things, making her look a little bit red. “Alright, I’ll catch you and…uhm…” she waved her hand around, still debating on what to call Jamie in her head, like quickly calculating some math problem in all possible angles, hoping to choose the best outcome. “…you _guys_ later.” Bree immediately regretted her choice and quickly turned around to walk to the house. First, it was not even in the choices and second, calling them collectively like that will almost seem that she didn’t care or understand the gravity of the impossibility of her father being in the present time or that she didn’t care enough about him at all to not even recognize him. Whatever he was – he will be – in her life, he deserved something better than _“you guys”_.

“You can…” she heard Jamie call and she stopped. _Did he notice her hesitate and flush? Did he recognize her trouble? Did he understand that the problem is only a simple matter of finding the proper semantics and not some ruse to push him away?_

Mama, did always say that Jamie always knew more than he let on - but mama always had a glass face. Add to the fact that, apparently, again, according to her mother, she inherited her father’s talent of masking emotions. _Did he see all past that in the short amount of time they’ve spent these last hours?_

 _Maybe_ , she thought first.  _Oh, I hope he did_ , she thought second.

“You can call me… _Da_ ” Jamie said, his voice still husky with sleep. “If ye want to, I mean” he added for measure, sensing the pressure and position she suddenly put his daughter in.

All three of them stood frozen in their spot, not wanting to push the moment too much, but at the same time, not wanting to ruin it. This was a major step in the building of their family and right now, it was up to Bree to decide if they were moving forward.

Slowly, their daughter turned around and looked at Jamie. “Da,” she said softly, trying to roll the word off her tongue, then a smile easily crept up her face. “Da. Is that gaelic?” she followed, putting the sudden tears that rose at bay.

Both Claire and Jamie relaxed at her acceptance, the latter being more affected than he thought he would be. _Da_ – the only name and title, besides being Claire’s husband, he wished to have in his life. Da – a name he wished all his life to be called, _Da_ – hearing it from the child of his and Claire’s blood and bones made him almost weak in the knees.

“No, it’s just… _simple_ ” he finally said, the smile on his face unwavering. Bree smiled and turned back to the house.

Claire went to Jamie’s side and he opened his arm to snuggle her close. He tugged at his shirt to pull him close, “Let’s get you inside, get _warmer_ ” she said with a slight suggestive tone.

The beamed at each other, offering a small laugh at what just happened and together, they walked through the manse’s door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This scene was suppose to go another way, maybe a little further in the timeline but in honour of Father’s Day, I jumbled the story a bit - hopefully, it fits and still works! (Let me know!) As always, comments and suggestions are always welcome! 
> 
> P.S I am so sorry that I am so bad at summaries.


	6. Surprise, Surprise!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Claire and Jamie start to navigate the 20th century together.

Jamie stood frozen of the manse’s doorway, transfixed in observing the wonders of the 20thcentury.

He didn’t know what they were called yet and couldn’t conjure memories of Claire’s stories to properly identify the things around him but he saw them, heard them, and he was incredibly curious.

_The ticking of the clock._

_The light from the lamp._

_The paintings on the walls and table that seemed to copy the likeness too precisely._

_The ringing of the telephone that made him jump in surprise._

Other than that, everything else seemed the same.

_The heat from the fireplace._

_The furniture around the house._

_The make and build of the house._

Yes, he can – no, _he will_ – adapt just fine. 

Claire felt how deep he thought when Jamie, she bet unconsciously, started squeezing her hand tighter. “Are you alright? Do you need a moment? Do you want to go out for a little air?” 

Jamie released a breath he didn’t know he was holding. “Nah, Sassenach. I’ll do, just tell me what everything is and I’ll make do” he gave her a small, sad smile that softened her.

Claire didn’t have a doubt how Jamie would fare in the 20thcentury but she knew she’ll need to help and convince him of the same idea as well. Releasing her hold on his hand, she laced her hands at the nape of his neck, focusing him on her. “Jamie, I’m here. I will never leave you again.” She pulled him close for a kiss and just as their lips were about to meet, Jamie’s stomach rumbled.

“Ach, I dinna mean to break your _thoughts_ , Sassenach, but – “Jamie pointed to his tummy area as the noise made itself known again.

Claire rolled her eyes, exasperated a humorous sigh and settled for quick peck on his lips. “Ugh, all right. Breakfast. But Jamie, we have to clean you up first?” He wasn’t overly filthy but a good hot shower might bring him a little comfort.

“Darling, remember when I told you about the hot baths?” Claire asked as they climbed up the stairs to the second floor of the house.

“Aye” Jamie nodded, remembering, as she stopped in front of one of the doors, opened it and led the way.

“So, this is a bathroom. It’s where we take a bath, shower, clean up…” Claire began to explain. He heard her but he was more focused on how Claire moved within the small space. She pointed to a faucet where the water comes from with a turn of a knob, taught her how to use the toilet and flush, pointed to a deep tub and lastly, showed her how to use and adjust the shower.

It was marvelous and Jamie had to admit, as new as he was to all this, he couldn’t wait to have his try.

Jamie was wearing breeks, long shirt and a vest when he passed through. No kilt, she noticed. She knew it was banned after the Battle of Culloden, along with many Scottish traditions Jamie grew up with and she have grown to love. He made his move to take off his pants but stopped to look at her. 

As happy as a reunion this was, it was not lost on both of them that the truth remains that they have been parted for twenty years. Physically, they were strangers and yet their souls called to one another, each claiming the other still. The heart wants to push but the head wants to pull, the battle was raging, both unable to stop it at the moment.

“I’ll be just in the other room. If you need me, just call” Claire turned to leave in understanding but just as turned the knob, Jamie hugged her from behind.

“I dinna want you to leave, Claire, but I dinna want you to see me like this, all mucked up, dirty, the first time you really _see_ me.” he softly said. Claire sighed and rested against him in understanding. Jamie moved his head closer to her ear and whispered. “I’ve said before and I’ll say it again. I want you, Claire. I want you so much I can scarcely breath but would you mind if we waited a bit still?”

“We waited almost twenty years, what’s a few hours more?” Claire turned around and gave Jamie a kiss on the cheek. “Now, bath. I’ll try to fetch you something to wear. If I’m not back by then, use this” Claire handed Jamie a bathrobe, hoping it would fit his size, and left Jamie to his devices.

Half an hour has passed and Jamie hasn’t emerged from the bathroom. Claire was starting to go hungry herself but wanted for Jamie and her to have breakfast together. Another minute and she decided to check up on him.

She could hear the shower running – still. A smile crept on her face as she probably knew why Jamie was taking so long. Opening the door, she let herself in and sat on the toilet.

“Now I know why ye’ll leave me for this, Sassenach. These hot baths are heavenly. It’s been a while since I’ve had time for a proper washing and I canna seem to finish this bath just yet” Jamie said, smiling, eyes still closed, allowing the water to rush through him.

“Told you they’re glorious. Feeling refreshed yet? I want to eat and I think you’d forgotten your hunger in all these hot water” Claire chuckled and then heard the water suddenly cut. Jamie reached out a hand over the shower curtain asking for a towel and Claire gladly gave it. She could hear him padding himself down and when Jamie pulled back the barrier, he was naked from the waist up, the towel secured on his hips like a kilt. 

She should look away. After the awkward moment of undressing earlier, they were walking on pins and needles at the moment, trying to navigate the 20thcentury - and each other - still. But she couldn’t help it.

His pelvic area was directly in front of her face and she could just outline where _he_ was. Her eyes travelled upwards, his abdominals looking as defined as ever (she should ask him how a man in his 40s have kept up in such amazing shape).

Moving up still, now to his broad chest, she could see droplets of water falling across it curved span. Her fingers twitched, aching to touch the delicious specimen before her. She bit her lip and bravely looked up to his face, stared directly to his eyes and conveyed every wicked thought that passed through her mind to her glass face. 

Jamie must’ve caught on, a smirk forming on his perfect mouth. “Sassenach, if you continue to look at me like that…” Claire sighed loudly, interrupting him, as she decided that to hell with time, they needed each other now.

But just as she was to tug him away, Bree called from the hallway.

“Mama, I bought some clothes I think Da could use for now” she said, holding a white long shirt, a pair of black slacks, a belt and some hotel slippers, she managed to find in the manse’s storage. “Roger and I found it. Hope it fits but if not, I can look for more or shop. Also, hurry up because your breakfast is getting cold”

It was then when Claire opened the bathroom door and Bree realized she was talking to an empty bedroom door. Walking over to her mother, she raised her eyebrows in an apparent amused knowing, then gave her the stuff. “Thank you, Bree. We’ll be down shortly.”

The tension was palpable but the moment was broken. Claire handed Jamie the clothes and left him again to change. She told him to come down afterwards for breakfast.

Claire found Bree and Roger just about to finish their food on the table, two empty plates beside them for Claire and Jamie.

“Do you have plans for today?” Claire asked Bree and Roger. Both shrugged in the openness of their schedule.

“I need you to do something for me”

-

Jamie came down the stairs to find Claire, Bree and Roger in discussion. He purposely walked a little louder to interrupt them just in case that they were talking about him.

He wasn’t just long in the bath because of the hot showers. Truth was, he was too lost in his own thoughts to have noticed the time gone by. While in the shower, Jamie contemplated a lot of things now that he’s in the 20thcentury.

Obviously, he was not of this time – by logic, he’s technically 245 years of age and supposed to be dead.

He’s not uneducated but surely, what he knows now is archaic and irrelevant. He can learn but what use of a man of his age in this century where everything seems to be too advanced?

He also knew that in this time, he is not known nor acknowledged by law and paper. Was he supposed to go in hiding for the rest of his life here? He wouldn’t allow Claire and Bree to live that kind of life. Can he go back? Will he go back?

Too many questions, all of them unanswered. He shook his head and tried to push it all away.

Bree noticed him first just as he stepped at the bottom of the stairs. “Da!” she called out naturally, surprising Claire and Jamie, both, but nonetheless, pleased.

“A nighean” he called out with a slight bow and Claire was immediately by his side. “Are ye leavin’?” he asked as he saw Bree grab her bag and Roger his keys.

“Yes. Roger, erm, is going to show me around the university he works at. I’m thinking of maybe signing on to take some classes while I’m here.” She flushed a bit and Jamie knew it was already the half truth but didn’t press. “We’ll be back by dinnertime”

Bree, then, proceeded to hug her mother and then turned to Jamie with an open arm as invitation too. He took it, the hug lasting a second more than necessary, then they were gone.

Alone once again, Claire took stock of how Jamie looked. The long shirt looked a little too big, with the sleeves hanging over his shoulder but nothing a good fold can’t fix. His slacks, however, fit well in the waist but with his height, hanged over his ankle. His long hair was drying, the curls slowly going back to their original shape.

“Do I look okay to ye?” Jamie nervously asked.

“Oh, darling, you look so fine, I’m almost deciding against what I had planned for us today” Claire replied, teasing.

They both sat to eat their breakfast while Claire was teaching Jamie everything that was around the house that he might not have an idea on. Jamie, ever the student, was diligent in listening as she explained everything and continued the conversation with follow-up questions until the food was gone and they have to leave for the day.

“I’ll just take a quick shower before we leave, feel at home” Claire said as she disappeared upstairs. Jamie toured the house on his own, going about each room, checking which is which and where is where. Touched things that looked harmless enough, observed how things functioned. Eventually, he sat down to the couch and grabbed a book, Gulliver’s Travels – a title he knew and read well to kill the time. He must’ve been too entranced because he didn’t hear her come down until he Claire hugged him by his shoulders from behind. “Let’s go” she whispered in his ear, her breath tickling him, and he almost needed help standing up.

The first stop for their trip was the barber. Jamie’s hair was far too long for Claire’s liking and thankfully, Jamie didn’t protest nor seem to mind the idea. “It’s no as if it won’t grow back, Sassenach?” They cut it short where his nape was left bare but the tendrils were long enough for Claire to comfortably run her hands through.

Their next stop was at the department store. Claire wouldn’t forget Jamie’s first reaction to it – open mouth in wonder, eyes looking everywhere, body humming with both anxiety and excitement. The items lay so plenty and full, he doesn’t have an idea how to rummage through it all. She wondered how much more surprised he’d be going to the grocery.

“I thought we’d buy you a couple of things to survive you in this century.” She grabbed Jamie by the hand and led them to the men’s department. The female attendants were more than willing to help Jamie measure his body to get his proper size and she let them just to watch Jamie get uncomfortable by so much female attention. It was harmless – most of them in their 40s or 50s – plus she was there to supervise if someone went a little overboard with her man, she’d easily glare at them to back off.

They got several long shirts, slacks, shirts, denims, shorts, sleepwear, shoes, undergarments and hygienic items.

Jamie let Claire handle everything. He wasn’t a vain man by nature but all she’s buying seems necessary as per her explanation. Before they left, she asked Jamie to change into his new clothes – a light blue long shirt, black denims matched with black boat shoes. When he came out of the dressing room, Claire could feel the entire room and floor have their eyes on him but he only had eyes for her. He was so striking; she could almost cry because of his beauty.

“Wait here” she said as she slipped in to the dressing room for her change of clothes. She emerged and Jamie let out a small gasp. Claire changed into a navy blue dress that came just below her knee, with a deep neckline and sheer sleeves. She purposely matched Jamie’s color scheme for tonight was a special night.

“I look okay?” Claire sheepishly asked a still-gaping Jamie Fraser.

“Okay? Ye look so bonny, Sassenach” Jamie said appreciatively. At the end of the dressing room, a full-length mirror caught their reflection and Claire smirked at little devilishly. He looked dashing and she looked not bad herself and together, they just stun. They were beautiful and the world was going to see it. She grabbed Jamie by the hand and they went home.

-

The sky was dusk by the time the left the store and the drive back looked lovely with the orange sky combined with the emerging city lights. Claire and Jamie, again, exchanged questions and answers about what everything was and she was pleased that Jamie was adapting fairly faster and better than she hoped. 

But a few minutes before they reached the manse, Claire noticed Jamie’s silence and was suddenly on alert. Before they walked to the door, she couldn’t take it anymore. “Jamie, what is it?” she turned and focused on him.

Jamie’s face was flushed and serious. “I’m sorry, Claire. I’m sorry that you have to explain everything to me. I ask for ye’re patience. I promise I’ll learn what I have to as quickly as I could but until then, I’m afraid I am at your mercy”

“What? Jamie, patient with you? Do you remember how you taught me everything I had to know in the 18thcentury? How you translated every song in Gaelic that I couldn’t understand? How you ate with me in the hall because no one would sit with a Sassenach, an alleged spy of the English? How you would defend me to the clansmen who thought against me? How you led me back to safety each time I got too stubborn for my own doing?” Claire began explaining as she gently caressed Jamie’s cheek. “I have all the patience in the world for you”

Jamie nodded in understand but Claire could see in his eyes that there is more. “What else?”

“Our daughter? She – She knows…everything?” Jamie quietly asked.

“Yes. She does.” Claire said proudly. “But Jamie she’s only known a week. She’s still adjusting to the truth and now that you’re here, I know she feels just beyond overwhelmed. But I know our girl, she loves you already, and you’ll get the chance to get to know her now”

“Aye, I know how she feels” Jamie said dejectedly. Coming through the stones was something they never thought was possible. They tried before but to no avail. But today has been an embarrassment of riches and she is with Claire and their child and he will do everything in his power to keep them with him. But the world has rapidly changed around him and Claire is the only constant in them. She had to be the strong one for all of them until they he and Bree can patch their own way together and for Claire, he will do just that. “Dinna fash, Claire. We’ll all make do eventually.”

He opened his arms and quickly, she is wrapped in his embrace. “Thank you, mo ghraidh”.

“I missed this.” Claire said contently. “I missed you.”

“And I, you, Sassenach. Do you ken why I was at the stones yesterday? What today is?” Jamie asked, hopeful.

At first, Claire’s brows furrowed and Jamie felt his heart drop a bit, _Have she forgotten a lot from our lives?_ , he thought. He couldn’t blame her, it has been twenty years and she had Bree, medical school, a lot in her life in the last two decades.

His thoughts were interrupted by a giggle that reverberated in his chest. “You should see the look on your face right now,” slightly patting his chest. She looked up and looked in his eyes, willing them to focus on her and cradled his face in her hands. “Jamie, I remember everything about our time together… _everything_.”

In the solitude of the deserted driveway, she pulled him down to her, closing the distance between them and slowly captured his lips in a long kiss. “Happy Birthday, Jamie. I am so happy you’re here and that I get to spend today and everyday with you, from now on and for the rest of our lives…I mean, if you’ll have me, have us”

Jamie gave her the broadest smile, “Sadist”, he jokingly remarked and captured her lips in a chaste kiss and she laughed while their lips were connected, the hum that passed through made his heart swell. “And Claire, I’ll always have you”. They continued to kiss and he brushed his tongue against her lips, requesting access. But she pulled away, confusing Jamie.

“I’m sorry, love, but don’t have time for that just yet” Claire pulled up a black fabric and looked at Jamie. “Do you trust me?”

“Aye.”

She smiled as she pulled it over his eyes and secured it at back of his head. She grabbed his hand and led him through the house. Jamie, having scoured it earlier in the day, was almost sure they were at the backyard. He freed his eyes and the sight before him had his heart melting.

“SURPRISE!!” Fiona, Roger, Bree and Claire exclaimed. The backyard was decorated with vintage string lights that gave the night its intimate glow. The long table was filled with food of different kinds and cuisines but he can spot the Scottish treats they put out as well.

It was a bonny night and Jamie turned to Claire, his perplexed look slowly changing to one of awe. “I love you, mo chride”. He lifted her chin and brought their lips together in a quick but deep kiss. “I love you, too”

Brianna cleared her throat and her parents. “Well, if you are finished?”

They all ate in contentment, exchanging stories of the day and how the surprise came to be. Jamie was right, the half truth of Brianna’s excuse earlier in the morning, it somehow pleased him that in the few hours he’s known his daughter, maybe, he can read her just like her mother. Claire shared how the women swooned over Jamie in the department store and Fiona just complained how Roger tried to help with the cooking but was no use at all. Roger told of his new colleagues in the university and how the office pranks have begun on them.

They talked and laughed until the night was high, food was gone and the wine was thoroughly consumed. Fiona started to pack up and Roger rose to help her haul the dishes, leaving the _Fraser_ family on their own.

“I was travelling back from Edinburgh when I stopped by the stones. I do it often just to talk to you, Claire, and imagine what you’d say to me. I know it’s daft but it’s the last place where we were together and sometimes I feel like I could hear your voice answering to me.” Jamie broke the silence. “Jenny told me to come home and spend time with family and by the miracle of the last 24 hours, I do.” He extended a hand to each of his lass and they took it. “Thank ye, both, for making this day the best one I’ve had in my life so far” He kissed each hand in gratitude.

They heard a click of the camera and three heads looked up to Roger who couldn’t help but smile himself. “I know it’s been a long night but I thought, maybe, you’d like to mark this day?”

Before anything, Claire explained how the camera worked and how the photos are developed. “What is captured in each click is what you’ll see in the photos later” Bree chimed in before they started.

They rose up and posed in the light. Luckily, Roger had kept a few rolls of film at his disposal and didn’t mind at all using it to the reunited family.

The first few shots were of the three of them – Jamie had his arms around both his lasses, another where Bree was sitting with both her parents at the back, one hand each on her shoulder, a few shots of Claire and Bree only when Jamie had to excuse himself to the loo.

When he came back, Claire was waiting for him to pose just the two of them. Jamie immediately went to her side, his arm on her back, snuggled together – a perfect fit. Roger called out for them to pose a little more.

Arms around each other smiling towards the camera,

Claire angling her body closer to Jamie’s,

Jamie lovingly gazed down at Claire when she wasn’t looking,

Claire looking up and smiling at Jamie’s face,

Jamie giving Claire a peck on the cheeks,

Them looking at each other like they’re the only people in the world,

Both leaning in for a kiss,

_Click._

-

It has been an eventful 48 hours that nobody realized that everybody’s been awake for that long. After their dinner, they all retired for a much deserved rest.

Bree retreated to the newly arranged bedroom, giving Claire and Jamie their own.

They both changed in the bathroom, still a little hesitant to be that intimate with each other. When Claire entered, Jamie was already sleeping, his body angled to his side. She thought he’d wait for her but apparently not. She laid down beside him and observed his face, a finger tracing his features and highlighting new lines in his face that wasn’t there before. They both grew up and grew old and surely there is a story that they may or may not want to hear and soon.

But nothing else mattered tonight than this - them. Everything else can wait for tomorrow. 

Slowly, she ran her hand at the back of his neck and there it was – a tug on his lips that formed a small smile. Jamie was happy and so was she.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter kinda ran away from me. :) I'm sorry it went long and kind of all over the place but a part of me didn't want to miss a beat. 
> 
> I knew that I wanted them to have a celebration scene/chapter since it was Jamie's birthday (I know this is kind of slow burn - 6 chapters and only 48 hours!) but at the same time, I wanted them to establish themselves in the time they are in. Hence, this chapter. 
> 
> I really hope you stick with the fic despite its very slow timeline so far, and were getting to the intense parts next but we'll also get to more good parts soon! 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading, I appreciate it all!


	7. Getting To Know You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Frasers spend some family quality time together.

Claire was feeling incredibly warm in what is supposed to be a very cold Scottish weather. She was starting to feel iffy in the heat and the quilt that covered her wasn’t helping either. She squirmed to get to a more comfortable position when she felt hands around her waist tugged her closer to the source of heat.

Unaccustomed to sharing a bed in the past decade or so, panic rose through her as her brain scrambled to remember where she was and who she was with.

_Jamie._

Slowly she turned her body to face him, opened her eyes to find blue blazing ones inches away from her own. She reached out a hand to touch his face and when flesh met flesh, a relieved and uninhibited sigh passed through her lips.  “I wanted to see if you were really here”

“Maybe I’m a ghost” He teased back as they mirrored each other’s smiles in the humor of the apparent joke - not a bad way to start the morning. “I could watch you for hours, Sassenach – see how you’ve changed, how you’re the same” Jamie raised a hand to touch her hair. “Mo nighean donn, ye recall? My brown-haired lass.”

“Well, yes.” Claire said sheepishly. “I was wondering if when you’ll call me that again.” she saw Jamie burrow his brow in confusion and she immediately followed with an explanation. “You’ve called me ‘sassenach’ a number of times since you came and I was waiting when I’d hear you call me ‘mo nighean donn’ again. I know I’m not exactly the brown-haired lass anymore… If I knew you were coming, maybe I’d dye my hair black, look the same as you last saw me. Maybe, I just missed it, you calling me that…and…” She wasn’t an overly vain woman but this was Jamie – the only man she wants to want her forever. _What if he doesn’t like her anymore? Suddenly realize she’s too old? Not attractive? Not enough?_

Claire was rambling both in her mind and words and Jamie can feel his wife’s insecurities get the best of her in the moment. But since the moment they met some odd twenty plus years ago, he always and instinctively knew how to calm her and her fears down. After all, that is how he fell in love with her in the first place.

Softly and lovingly interrupted her. “I like the gray…mo calman geal. The way the light hits it – it’s like a bit of silver moonlight.” He said, whispering loving assurances that he can freely give her.

“Flatterer” she nudged her nose to his. “And that will get you everywhere, Mr. Fraser.” They laughed and Jamie leaned in for a quick good morning kiss.

As they broke apart, Jamie held her eyes in his, captivating her to focus to him. _“_ But time doesna matter Sassenach, ye will always be beautiful to me.” he said so tenderly, Claire could almost cry. She buried herself even further in his embrace, wishing it were possible to be even closer than they were now. 

 “How can I not love a man who says such things.”

Claire lifted her head so she’s eye to eye with Jamie. For a moment, they just looked at each other. Memorizing each surface of their faces, what was familiar and unfamiliar, rekindling and re-knowing each other again, as if carefully assessing a recent purchase.

Claire spoke first, not breaking their eye contact. “A long time ago, you asked me what it was between us.”

“I remember. What it is when I touch you and you lie with me” Jamie followed up, every word memorized and etched in his brain.

“I said I didn’t know” she traced a finger up Jamie’s arm until it reached his hand and she let their fingers intertwine.

“I dinna ken either”

“I still don’t”

“But it’s still there. Aye?”

She nodded at their mutual conclusion. They might not know yet the people they’ve become now but even after all these years, they could still understand each other, know what each other’s thinking, finish each other’s thoughts and sentences. They are a little rusty but they’ll be back to their normal pace once they talk everything out _soon_.

Claire lifted her face, wanting another kiss before they began their day and Jamie is always happy to oblige. He leaned in but was cut short by their 20-year old daughter.

“Late Breakfast! Or Brunch!” Brianna called out as she knocked loudly on their door. They giggled as the thought of being interrupted by their adult daughter during what can be said as the beginnings of an _intimate_ time amused them.

-

“Where’s Roger and Fiona?” Claire asked as she and Jamie emerged from their bedroom to find their daughter solitary in the kitchen stove, cooking away the rest of their meal.

“Roger had an early lecture this morning and Fiona begged this morning off since we finished so late last night, but she’ll come by later this afternoon” Bree explained away, Claire and Jamie accepting the explanation with the way their heads nodded in understanding. In truth, Bree requested Fiona to come in a little late so she could spend time alone with her parents but she was too embarrassed to admit that yet.

Claire and Jamie waited for Bree to come out with their food, the table set for three waiting for a hearty family meal together.

“I prepared or tried to prepare a full Scottish breakfast for us. Hope I did it some justice” a disclaimer before she said before presenting the food to her parents.

A combination of tomatoes, bacon, potatoes, sausage, mushrooms, beans, egg and black pudding were strategically laid across the plate and both Claire and Jamie look more than pleased with the result.

“Looks delicious, darling.” Claire said, pulling the napkin to her lap.

“Thank you, a nighean” Jamie chimed in, giving her the sweetest smile.

“What does that mean?” Bree asked as they all began eating.

“Ye’ll no have the gaelic then?” Jamie said teasingly and Bree shook her head at Jamie’s question. Of course, she hasn’t but Jamie didn’t seem to begrudged by it. It was really very understandable. “But I’ll learn, I can do it” a very determined Brianna assured him.

“Well, consider this your first class, then.  ‘A nighean’, it means ‘lass’”

“And what about the name you called mama? Sasse- _nak_?”

“Oh, that just means Englishman. Or Englishwoman for your mam. Outlander. Stranger. Not from Scotland” Jamie said in succession. “Though dinna call the English that, it’s actually an insult”

“You call mama an insult?” Bree asked in fascination.

Claire just nodded in agreement. “First in jest, then in affection” she explained to her daughter, then eyed Jamie having a silent conversation of their own.

“How about you, mama? Any nicknames you called Da?”

Both faces scrunched in deep thought.

“Only names I can remember yer mam calling me besides my own is ‘sadist’ and ‘bastard’” Bree laughed and Claire elbowed Jamie to the chest.

“Come to think of it,” Claire said. “I got nothing. I just called him Jamie”

“Cause it’s easier to call out when she’s in danger – which was constantly!” another elbow landed on Jamie’s chest.

They ate heartily, enjoying the feast Brianna has prepared and nurturing the time they were having as a family. They talked about anything and everything, from Bree’s first words to Claire teaching sex education at her daughter’s school, to Jamie sharing stories of when his mam made him learn knitting during rainy days at Lallybroch.

“Speaking of which, Sassenach,” the slight hesitation in his voice caused his two lasses to look up at him.

“Out with it” Claire pushed gently. 

“Do ye ken what is of…Lallybroch?” he bluntly asked.

“Oh,” Claire placed her utensils down and wiped her mouth with a napkin, “Actually, Lallybroch is mine.”

“What?” now it was Brianna’s turn to put down her spoon and fork.

“I…ah” she moved her head and hand around as if painting a picture they’d suddenly understand but her two red heads just continued to stare at her in confusion and anticipation.

“I may have left Scotland but Scotland really hasn’t left me. Before we left for Boston, I asked Mrs. Graham to look it up for me and we found it. The _Murrays_ still lived there that time. I was happy to know that after all those years, it was still in the family. However, a few years later, Mrs. Graham sent a letter that the family was selling the estate as they are moving to the United States and couldn’t oversee it anymore, so I bought it – keep it _still_ in the family.”

Both father and daughter are still stunned with silence so Claire continued on.

“It actually took three years for the renovations to be complete with the building as old as it was but your father built a very good foundation to it and wasn’t an issue. Don’t worry, darling,” addressing Jamie, “I kept all the history in the building, even the marks left by English in the doorway. I just updated it with modern appliance, heating and plumbing, but I made sure it felt as close to home as it was before – the furniture looks almost the same as we had back then. I was actually planning on surprising you two with a trip there but since you asked.” Claire resumed eating her breakfast, “I rent it out as a little bed and breakfast up in the highlands. It’s quite a beautiful retreat, if I say so myself”

Following her lead, Jamie and Bree returned to their food too. “When do we go?” their daughter asked.

“End of the week? Finish the classes you’re taking this week then we’ll make a trip for it. Sounds good?”

“It’s a plan, then.” Jamie said. “I canna wait to see what ye’ve done with it, Claire

They spent the in the manse just talking and getting to know each other. Their conversation mostly centered on Bree’s life from her birth to the present. The day she was born, the day she turned over by herself, the day she first walked, her first supermarket meltdown, her first lost tooth, her first day in school, the day she rode the bike in two wheels, her first overseas trip (to France!), her first school crush, her friends in Boston, her love for history and engineering, her recent graduation from high school and now studying in Harvard and all the things in between they could think about to share with him.

Frank was never mentioned and the conversation, thankfully, never needed to steer in that direction. Claire and Brianna happily recalled memories of their life, willing to share them with Jamie in the hope that it will fill a hole about how fruitful the sacrifice he made was and not a reminder how much he’s missed.

Jamie, to his credit, masked away any painful feelings he had as they shared their stories. It hurt but a larger part of him wanted to know everything about his family and he followed their stories with questions that gave him more details.

He loved hearing them talk, loved that they wanted him to know, appreciated how they carefully and gracefully pictured to him their life. He’s missed a lot but the way he sees it, Brianna grew up the way he always pictured and hoped and how Claire promised she would be, loved and raised-well.

The time went by so quickly that they only managed to look at the clock when a knock on their door interrupted them.

-

Roger could hear laughing at the other side of the door that he almost regretted disturbing them.

“What?” Brianna greeted the door. Her long red hair waved in the incoming wind and Roger was stunned.

“Sorry, I should have ringed if were still on for tonight” he hesitantly said.

“Oh, right! That seminar was tonight! I completely forgot! Wait, give me a few minutes to prepare” She ushered him in to the living room where Claire and Jamie were happily sipping their whiskey.

“Roger!” Claire rose and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Jamie stood up to nod briefly at him.

“Claire. Jamie” he acknowledged them.

“Mama! Remember the talk on ancient engineering I was telling you about the other day. That’s tonight! Would you mind if I went?”

Claire looked at Jamie and they knew the opportunity presented to them. It was a chance to be alone and whatever discussion they might have tonight, they prefer for Bree not to hear it.

“No, of course not, darling. Run up stairs in the shower and I’ll prepare your clothes” Claire said as mother and daughter disappeared upstairs, leaving Roger and Jamie alone.

Jamie offered Roger some whiskey but refused as there will be probably be some alcohol consumed at the venue. He also didn’t want to be too intoxicated to take care of Claire and Jamie Fraser’s daughter.

Roger motioned for them to sit at the sofa while waiting the Claire and Brianna and Jamie broke the silence first.  “I dinna have time to thank ye for your hospitality to me and my family”

“Ach, it’s no mind. Claire and Brianna have been the most wonderful distraction to my father’s recent passing” Roger shared.

“I’m sorry to hear it, lad” Roger quietly thanked him. After a few ticks of the clock, Roger grabbed his briefcase and turned to Jamie.

“I do not know if Claire’s mentioned it but I’m a historian.” Roger shifted the topic. “That’s what I do. I pursue. I’m like a dog with a bone. Since uncovering Claire’s secret, I’ve been helping them find you and I think I did”

“Ye did?” Jamie asked, curious. What could of him, besides Brianna, have survived the last 200 years?

He opened his briefcase and shuffled papers around until he found what he was looking for. “Well, I found an article written in 1765 in a journal called Forrester’s. It advocates the repeal on the restrictions of the import of spirits to the Scottish highlands.” He handed Jamie the paper and together they examined it. “This line – ‘For as has been known for ages past, Freedom and whiskey gang thegither’ – I think ye wrote it.”

Jamie looked at him, impressed by what he’s found. “Go on”

“Even in the opening of the article, you quote the poem again, addressing the ruling classes – ‘Ye knights an’ squires, wha’ represent our Brughs and Shires’ – this is a poem by Robert Burn, who was only six years old in 1765. This poem wasn’t written until 21 years later. Only someone with knowledge of the future could have quoted lines that hadn’t been written yet” Roger’s face was so alight with the discovery.

“It dinna indicate an author, though?” Jamie threw back, putting a little more skepticism in his findings but Roger handed him another piece of paper.

“I have the printer’s name – Alexander Malcolm – that’s ye, aye?”

“Aye, tis me. And yes, I did write this and all yer assumptions are true. Verra good, Roger!” he patted him a little too strong in the back that had Roger thumping forward a little. When he found his footing again, he went on, explaining more what he’s found.

“Tis is the start I needed to trace ye. I followed the trail back and found a little bit more about you since surviving the… _war_. I ken how ye survived and some pieces of your life in Broch Mordha, Ardsmuir, Helwater and back to Broch Mordha again.”

Then Roger hesitated and Jamie felt him turn serious, alarming him to what he feared most. “I ken about your other… _family_ ” Roger paused. “I was gonna tell Claire and Bree when I got back from the stones. I assume you’ve already told her…” Jamie’s eyes widened in panic but refused to look at Roger as he noticed his obvious wince. “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to…”

“It doesna matter. The truth shall be out one way or another. I guess ye knowing just pushes me to not keep it from her” Jamie ruefully said. He wasn’t planning on keeping his marriage to Laoghaire a secret forever but he thought they’d have more time to ease into each other again before they talked about the harder stuff.

Their connection might still be as it once was but the thread in which they were walking were still awfully thin and this revelation might just completely break it off. So no, he wasn’t planning on telling Claire…yet. But with Roger knowing, he couldn’t lie to Claire like that. He promised – after all – honesty and that has always been one of the strong pillars of their marriage. If it’s as strong as it feels it is, then hopefully, it will withstand this storm. “It was good to tell me. Thank ye, Roger”

Roger went on to share more of what he found out about Jamie’s life and he was obligingly happy to either confirm or deny his findings. Roger couldn’t help but feel a little ashamed of taking advantage of Jamie and Claire with their accurate knowledge of the history he’s spent his life searching about – but he had the the closest thing to an accurate account and he can now search or confirm their story and change history as it was written. It will be a huge advancement for his career but at the end of the day, he knew he should, at least, ask permission and tell them of his intentions. .

“Do ye mind if I used all these yer telling me and modify a few facts written in our current books? It will greatly help in my career, ye ken, but I wilna do it if ye so.” Roger asked Jamie.

“Nay, write and change it. Is that not what history is about? Learning from the past in the hope ye can make a better future? Ye need to to share another perspective of history in the hopes that it can change how we see the world today – Claire told me that a long time ago, one of the things she learned traveling around the world with her Uncle Lamb.”

“If what I know is not yet written or ye feel it can add into something, then do it. I’ll be verra glad that this auld man’s wisdom is still worth something. Either way, it’ll be a shame to bring all these stories to the grave. I might as well put it out there to survive, hopefully, for a long long long time.” Jamie encouraged and Roger was the happiest kid on the block that night.

They talked more about Scottish history, Jamie surprisingly not feeling the heaviness re-telling the life he’s lived in the last twenty years. Maybe it was feeling safer in this time, maybe it was Roger and their budding kinship but astonished him that he found himself trusting him with more of his story in the very short time he’s known him. In some ways, Jamie Fraser might’ve found a new friend.

-

“Are you going to tell him everything?” Claire chuckled, eyeing Brianna from the mirror as she brushed her hair. “I can see in your eyes that you can’t wait for me to leave the house.” Stubborn and inquisitive, Brianna was certainly their daughter.

“Is there something I should _not_ tell him about?” Claire asked, curious as to what the question meant.

Brianna shrugged. “Does he know about Daddy?”

“He does” Claire replied casually. She went to Bree and placed both of her hands on her shoulders. “The one thing Jamie and I promised to each other was to always be honest with each other. We can have secrets, but not lies – that was our rule. I will tell him everything and if he asks something, I will answer it.”

“Aren’t you scared he’ll leave if he doesn’t like what he hears? What you’ll hear?”

To be honest, it never crossed Claire’s mind until Bree mentioned it. Sure, talking about Frank with Jamie might be uncomfortable but it never occurred to her if it will be enough to drive him away. And knowing what happened to Jamie after the war, could he be the same person she fell in love with? What new demons might he carry inside him? The conversation was going to be worse than what Claire thought it would be and she already felt sick to her stomach.

“Well, that’s why we need to talk. Better have it all out now than later.” Claire said as Bree stood up, preparing to leave. “You look good to go. Ready to head out?”

Roger and Jamie were discussing clan laws just as Claire and Bree came downstairs. Both men stood up the moment they stepped on the landing.

It was going to be a long night – for all of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three things: First, I am so sorry for posting this chapter so late. As a writer (or just me?), I'm always constantly questioning the quality of my work and more often than not, think that it's not worth it. But I do love to write and I love this story, so here it is. Don't worry, there's more storyline to come and I am writing it. Second, thank you all for the amazing feedback on this story, your encouragement is one of the reasons I can move forward with posting this. You guys are the best. Third, as always, comments and suggestions are always welcome. You can even suggest a scenario if you want, just hit the comments! 
> 
> P.S Next chapter might be a little angsty but our favourite couple, as always, will make it through. THEY WILL NEED TO TALK and TALK THEY WILL! <3


	8. A 20-Year Recap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claire and Jamie share the story of their lives since they last saw each other some 20 years past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In honor of my birthday last 7th of November (plus the fact that I now have extra free time on my hands), I wanted to update and post a new chapter for this story, so here it is! 
> 
> It took me a while to write this deciding back and forth how it should go and of course, writing it that way but I love how I went with it and how it turned out - I just hope I did it a certain justice and you guys like it. I love this story and have some plots in place that I am excited to write next. 
> 
> As always, comments and suggestions (and violent reactions!) are always welcome. If you want to suggest a plot, feel free to drop a prompt in the comments :) 
> 
> Thank you guys for reading this wee story of mine. It means a lot.

Before Roger was able to pull Brianna away from the driveway, Jamie gave very explicit instructions about the honor and safety his daughter and made promises as to what will happen to him if he breaks any one of them. From Jamie the highland storyteller, he immediately changed to Jamie the father once Bree announced that she was going out for the night.

Brianna almost whined at how much Jamie talked, to a point where Claire had to intervene and interrupt so that they could both leave and catch the event on time.

Ever the gentleman, Roger opened the door for Bree and made his way to the other side of the car.

“How was breakfast?” he asked as he entered the car and started the engine. Roger has been filled in about how Jamie came through the stones the day he and Bree went about grocery shopping for Jamie’s birthday dinner the night before.

“It was surprisingly fun.” Bree said with a slight somber tone in her voice and Roger stayed silent, urging her to continue as he drove the car away from the house. “It’s just that… when I was growing up, we didn’t spend time like this. In the morning, everything was a rush. Me going to school, Mama going to the hospital and Daddy going to the university. On the weekends, we didn’t exactly have our mornings timed out for us to have breakfast together – it’s usually one parent or the other with me. When we did have rare times out as a family, we’d be at a hospital or university party and they’d spend time talking to other people than with each other. If we went to a restaurant, they’d ask about me and let me talk for hours.”

She sighed as memories of her childhood flooded through her mind. “Growing up, I understood our priorities as a family but I thought that was how it was suppose to be, that it was normal the way we were. But now, seeing my mother with Jamie and how were all making this effort to be together, not that I don’t love it because I do, but it just reminded me more of how much even I probably missed in life, how much mama and daddy had to sacrifice for my sake.”

Roger could sense her growing melancholy and didn’t want to push her further. “Ye dinna have to talk about it if ye don’t. We’ve bit of a drive but we can talk about something else” he offered.

“Thank you.” Bree replied.

“So, why did this engineering seminar interest you so much?” he asked as they drove straight to the university.

-

As Roger’s taillights fade away in the early evening, the happy noises that was bursting earlier was suddenly occupied by a tensioned silence that grew more in each passing second.

Claire and Jamie, now, have the house to themselves for some private time to connect and to settle their score. As by some unspoken agreement, both knew what they were suppose to do tonight.

“I’ll just grab something from the kitchen”

“I’ll get the fire running”

They both said at the same time. Mindlessly, they nodded to each other and proceeded to their chore.

Claire found three full bottle of whiskey and brought them up to the living room. She was sure they would need a little liquid luck to deal with themselves tonight. Jamie was already seated and she occupied the seat across from him – putting a little distance to themselves seemed best at the moment. She opened a bottle, poured them both a generous amount, a dram of whiskey now in each other’s hand.

“Claire,” Jamie began. His use of her real name were only reserved in true moments of seriousness and tonight was one of those nights. “I did ask ye honesty once and now I ask ye of it once more.” Claire nodded. “What happened to ye these last twenty years?” Jamie finally asked.

“Do you want to know _everything_?” Claire asked, rolling the last word in an obvious manner, the question and meaning clear to them both.

“Aye.” Jamie said as he straightened in his seat on a chair that barely fit his size.

She knew the things this conversation would force to open up but she did promise Jamie honesty and she won’t shy away in telling him about her life, especially, her life with Frank. He had the right to know and whatever reaction he may have, she’d deal with it. However, she has set a rather high moral standard from her husband and she was fairly sure he’d forgive her. She took a deep breath and began her tale, giving Jamie the main highlights of her life since she left him.

“After I passed, I walked aimlessly in the road waiting for a car to find me. It was not hard to spot me, after all, I was wearing clothes from the 18thcentury and any person who will stop to either to mock me or help me. The first car that stopped, thankfully, did the latter.

The heartbreak was still fresh and I was a mad at the world for our circumstance. The man who stopped, I grabbed him by his collar and demanded to know who won the Battle of Culloden. Maybe history changed, I thought, but when he said the English won, my heart broke – for you and the Scotland I have grown to love. I cried and broke down in the middle of the road and it was a miracle that he still helped me to the hospital despite my catatonic state.

By the time I got there, I went into a silent daze. I didn’t need to tell them my name for I have been in the missing persons list for three years and the guard at the hospital knew immediately who I was. They examined me then - it was protocol for the doctors to conduct a check-up in cases like mine. My communication was limited to a shrug or nod. When all was done, they settled me in a room, and I stared out the window in the combined sadness, anger and rage I felt all at the time.

Then Frank came. He was so happy to see me, Jamie, and it added to my anguish that I knew, sooner or later, I would be taking that happiness away.” She paused to sip a drink and Jamie did too.

“My disappearance has become a fascinating tale in the three years I was missing. A photographer snuck in and took a photo of me and the next day I was in the paper. It was then Frank decided that we’ll stay with Reverend Wakefield, an old friend of his and Roger’s foster parent, the one who lived in this house before. He has the best collection of Jacobite history, probably, in Scotland. When we arrived there, I asked for everything he had about Culloden. I know you asked me to forget you but I just couldn’t, Jamie.

She could see Jamie’s face turn into stone in an attempt to an emotional escape but before he could, she’d already seen the nervousness flush over his body. “What did you ken?” he asked slowly. Jamie’s eyes fell to the ground and Claire was starting to get nervous. “Did ye look for me when ye got back?” Jamie couldn’t help ask the question. Jenny’s voice ran through his mind as he recalled his last visit and he’d told her of his plans to move to Edinburgh.

_“It’s still Claire, is it?” Jenny said mockingly. “Let her go, brother. She left you. Why are you still pining over her. You have a wife now and 2 bairns to devote yerself to. Be content in that”_

_Jamie huffed in resignation. He will never be content in a life without Claire and Jenny knew nothing, he reasoned to himself. He loved his sister dearly and for the most part of their lives, he’d always told her what was in his heart. But Claire’s secret will be too much for her to handle, so Jamie decided to remain silent as his sister continued to scold him._

_“I still don’t know what happened to her, if she’s alive or dead but Jamie - if she was, the Claire I kent will never stop looking for you”_

The conversation was almost a year old and though Jamie did not think about it much then, the question was asked now and an answer was coming.

“I did! I looked for you for weeks! I read every book about the Battle of Culloden that I could get my hands on and searched every page for even a glimpse of you or any clue that can lead towards you. I was going mad looking for you!” She said rather angrily in her defense. Claire didn’t know where the anger came from but she needed Jamie to know and understand that it wasn’t as easy for her as he might think it was. “But I found nothing. I didn’t know you were alive. I’m as surprised by your presence here now just as you might be shocked passing through the stones!”

They quickly composed themselves and Jamie nodded for Claire to continue.                                                                           

“After a while, Mrs. Graham, the only person in this century who believed what happened to me, talked to me about not chasing a ghost and live whatever life I still had. And I did try, Jamie. I fucking tried but I couldn’t. I’ve lived half a life for the past twenty years.”

Jamie felt Claire’s words go through him blow by blow. He had asked of her those things and he felt nothing but utter regret at that moment.                                                                                                                                                                 

“After that, I told Frank everything about our life – the stones, you, Scotland, Paris, Culloden, everything except one. I didn’t tell him about Faith -  he only knew about her when I had to tell the doctor I had a miscarriage when I was giving birth to Bree but he never asked about that after she was born.

Despite that, he still wanted me back, begged me to come back to him. And then I told him I was pregnant and his face changed to happy to angry in two seconds with the realization that it wasn’t his and it confirmed in some way to him, that I did have somebody else in my life – a somebody that I loved enough to stay wherever I was, risk and leave everything and have a child with. It took all the control he had not to lash out and hit me and for brief moment, I saw a flash of someone else running through his blood.

Anyway, even though he didn’t believe me, he still accepted me back and accepted Bree in the condition that I forget you and we raise Bree as his – our – own. I accepted his offer not because Frank asked but because you made me promise to go back to him and forget you.

Frank got a position at Harvard and we moved to Boston immediately after. He bought us a huge brownstone house, made me as comfortable as I can be. I tried to pretend that I was okay but the moment Frank leaves the house, I just cry, be miserable and miss you so much. Everything reminded me of you and our life - a bird, the fireplace, my ring, our child…

I didn’t think I was deliberately pulling away from him, rather, I think I was just unconsciously still hung up on the past and it was a big issue between us. We’ll have days where there is just too much tension in living and we fought a lot. I was living in my own world and he was desperately trying to get in but I won’t let him. I don’t know why I couldn’t have given him a chance to - maybe I was giving him a way out and wanted him to take the open road but he just wouldn’t go away. If it was his choice to leave, then I wouldn’t be breaking my promise to you”

Claire was sure she saw Jamie briefly smirked at the thought. She couldn’t help but smile at bit too. The thought that even after all these time, they still wanted each other, wanted what each other wanted, remembered the promises they made, always brought a happy feeling. But the moment was fleeting and the night is just getting started.

“But everything changed when Bree was born. Frank never wanted to adopt but he was captured with Bree the moment he saw her. He was a good father to her and really dedicated his life to her. After that, we…tried to be a couple, decided that Bree was the fresh change we needed, made ourselves look like what society envisioned as a ‘family’. The next few years had been bearable. I had Brianna, she had a stable life, a mum and dad. I focused on that and being her mother.“

“Did ye and Frank...touch?” Jamie asked. They were putting it out there anyways.

“We did. A few several times after Bree was born. We would be invited to dinners with other couples and it was so obvious how out of sync we were. I guess there came a moment when we just needed to do it – to feel that were still people inside and not just some hollow shell of a person. I would always close my eyes when we did it, pretend that it’s you – made it a little more bearable and made me feel less guilty to my promise to you.”

Claire hated that Jamie can masterfully mask his feelings still. She couldn’t figure out if he was angry or sad at what she said but know that it was probably both. It was taking all of his control to not say something back. He stayed quiet, ending that question and continued on.

“Everything sort of changed when I decided to go to medical school. At that time, women were just recently accepted to the program and there was a lot of stigma. I was a nurse when I went through the stones but I encountered more than what I can when I was tending to patients there. I knew my calling, then, was in the medical field and I needed more. Brianna was growing up and started school and I could not be just in the house the entire day.

Frank didn’t exactly give me the approval to do it but when I got in, he made sure that Bree was well-taken care off. When Brianna was seven, the babysitter left her alone and she wandered outside to look for me, she was hit by a slow-moving car,” Jamie hitched at his seat but Claire raised an arm to control the situation back. “…and I lost it. I decided to quit the program but Frank told me not to and offered to take Brianna to his office every after school. I was ready to exchange medicine in a heartbeat for Brianna but more important, because of you. Brianna is yours – ours - the only thing of you that I have and that is more important than any degree I will have had then. But Frank insisted I continue and I did.

I graduated medical school, almost in the top of my class and we had celebratory drinks at the house. The doorbell rang and I answered it to a woman I didn’t know who stood shock still in front of me. He was Frank’s mistress or girlfriend. Sandy was her name. I knew Frank had other mistresses over the years before but he seemed serious about this one. Their affair went on for almost a decade until his death about two years ago. It was a car crash.

We actually fought the night he died. I got home one evening, preparing for my surgery the following morning and he came down late at night. He told me he was bringing Brianna to England for the summer. I thought maybe it was for a vacation but it turns out he’s taking her away for good. I got angry and we let it all out after 18 years. Said, he wanted a divorce me and marry Sandy and at last, he confronted me - asked me if I could look at Brianna and not see you, asked me if I had forgotten you with time.”

“What did you say?”

“I told him that that amount of time doesn’t exist”

There was a pause as they let the words sink in between them. However, there was still tension in the air because as true as it was to Claire, maybe it wasn’t the same for him.

“I think that was the last blow for him. The last confirmation that I will not be coming back to him. He grabbed his keys and went for a drive the entire night. I didn’t know if he came home in the morning but and the next day after a surgery, I was told that he had died.”

“Did you love him?” Jamie boldly asked again and there was no doubt in her mind what the answer was going to be.

“No and I’m pretty sure he damned my soul for it.” Jamie grunted at her bluntness but it was the truth. “I was happy raising Brianna with him, though. He was a good father to her, Jamie. Just as you thought he would be.”

Claire released the tension she was holding on her shoulders – released twenty years worth of story, told to the only man she wanted to know everything about her. “That’s about it, I guess. I can tell you more if you have questions or when I remember something else.”

She paused, finished her dram in one sip then turned to him. “How about you? Would you tell me what’s been going on in your life these past 20 years?” Claire asked simply, continuing the conversation.

“Honestly, aye?” he asked, meeting her eyes.

“Yes, everything” she replied and Jamie nodded.

“The ride back to Culloden was the worst day of my life. I didn’t mind dying because I knew my soul died the moment ye slipped away from my arms at the hill. Ye left yer tartan and I took it – it still smelled like ye and I thought I’d die from heartbreak before a pistol or sword could in battle.

When I arrived at Culloden, we were taking our positions in the field and I put myself in front. I was still a commander and I put on a brave face for my fellowmen and decided to fight for Scotland until I no longer could. Just as ye told me, the battle ensued and became bloody really, really fast. In the middle of the chaos, my eyes locked with Black Jack Randall and in that moment, I had but only one fight to win or lose.” Jamie paused and lifted the makeshift kilt he was wearing and revealed a long scar that ran up his thigh. Claire fought the urge to touch it and let him continue on instead. “He got me first but before I went down, I got him back and had my revenge. I fell to the ground and then everything went dark. I was roused awake by tiny snowflakes on my face, the cold jolting me to life. And then, I realized I wasn’t dead.

Rupert rescued me and all of us Scottish survivors hid in a small hut until we were found by a Redcoat commander by the name of Harold Grey. One by one, I heard my fellowmen be killed and it was..” Jamie paused, eyes focused to the fireplace. Claire knew what it took for him to relive this but they needed to do it for them. “Nothing hurt more than ye leaving, Sassenach, but seeing the Scotland I know die away, my men moaning in pain, listening to their cries or their last words, the shot of the pistol and the slump of their dead bodies – tis’ one of the most painful moments of my life."

Jamie paused – first, to redeem himself from the bad memory; second, to say a quick, silent prayer for his fallen comrades.

“Before Rupert went, we had a talk and made our peace with what happened with Dougal. After he’s gone, I decided that it was my time too. Ye were gone and I knew ye and the bairn were safe, I made peace with our situation and was ready to go. I told my name but Harold Grey stopped my execution”

“Why?”

“Remember the boy we found down in Carryarick? The one who ye rescued from being captive by us?”

“Yes. He, uhm, owed ye a debt of honor, if I remember correctly? For sparing his life?”

Jamie gave a small smile. Claire remembered and he was well pleased.

“Aye, William “John” Grey was the boy ye rescued. Turns out Harold Grey is his older brother. John after all, had kept his word and told his family about it. Harold ordred his men to find a cart and drive me back to Lallybroch as payment for his family’s promise. He figured the long ride and wound in my leg would be damage enough that will kill me.

The travel back was excruciating and rough. The wound was festering, I was running on a high fever, my body ached all over from cuts and injury I didn’t know where. I honestly didn’t have enough strength to think about living – by then, it was just ye I kept thinking about and figured, death will just come and take me sometime without me knowing. Next thing I knew, I was waking up to Jenny and Ian’s touch, rousing me awake. By some miracle, I was still alive.

Of course, there was the issue of my leg. No matter how Jenny tended to it, it would not heal. She thought about cutting it off but Ian stopped her – said that he can handle it but wasn’t sure that with ye being gone and losing a limb, that I could take it all. So one evening, Jenny cut the wound as deep as she could, had two or three tenants sit on me and then she poured scalding hot water over the wound.”

Claire gave a gasp, imagining the scenario. Even in thought, she couldn’t comprehend just how torturous the whole experience was.

“Aye, I know. I dinna know if that’s the right thing to do but she’s as wee stubborn as ye and wouldn’t let me die that easily. But it worked, no? I am still here after all and I can walk. She saved my leg, mo nighean donn, just as ye saved my hand” Jamie encouragingly said, ending the story with a lingering gaze of thanks.

“As ye know in yer history, the aftermath of the English victory brought the end to our highland culture. The redcoats roam about our lands, stealing the meager resources we had left, seizing our property for the crown, add to the fact that I was, yet again, a wanted man. It was dangerous having me in the house had the English come unexpected, so I decided to live in a cave near the property. I lived there for close to seven years. In all those times, I just fell down in a rabbit hole of silence. I went down to the house when it was safe or when I was able to hunt food for the family, I took books to read as company, and sometimes, Fergus would visit me and spend time with me, catch up on the family. But what I dinna realize was happening was me slowly losing myself to the isolation.

I couldna speak to Jenny or Ian about ye without them asking too many questions. I saw my nieces and nephews grow up and though I do love them a lot, it was a reminder of the time I was missing with our bairn, Brianna. It was only up in the mountain that I get to spend time with the memory of ye, talk to ye, pray for ye and our child. Jenny scolded me for holding on to ye, that I was alive but no living.”

Claire knew how that felt and she let a tear fall for that emotion.

“I was at the house when Jenny gave birth to wee Ian when the redcoats came. Earlier that day, Fergus, Rabbie and wee Jamie saw a raven and thought it was bad luck. Fergus got a hold of a pistol and shot it down. There must be a patrol nearby because minutes later, the English came looking for a weapon that was illegal to have. Without an ounce of respect or decency, they demanded a search even though Jenny was indisposed. I had the bairn in my arms and hid in a closet praying to God that he wouldna make a sound. The ordeal came to an end with Mary McNab admitting to the ownership of the gun and gave the raven story as her excuse. Thankfully, they released her on a warning and then they were gone.

But one corporal somehow heard me and he put a guard at the house. Fergus tried to sneak off to my cave one morning but he was followed. Clever kid he was, he led them away from my cave but to the expense of him losing his hand. The English were merciless. I saved him but I couldna save his hand but Fergus is loyal to me and never begrudged me for it.

It was the last straw for me. I couldna bear putting my family at risk like that.

I talked to Ian and Jenny and planned one of the tenants to “betray” me to the English in return to the reward for my capture.”

“Jamie…” breathed Claire. She knew her husband was a noble man but that plan was insane.

“Of course, they dinna like it but it was my choice. The potatoes ye told us to plant were enough to keep us afloat after the war but the farm was still struggling – the money will help and my arrest will keep them safe. The night before my arrest, Mary came to my cave and we...” He heard Claire take a deep breath, realizing where the story was heading as of preparing herself for the smack of emotions it will entail. “I dinna want to, Claire, but she insisted and it had been so long since… “ he trailed. “She gave me tenderness and I hope I gave her some in return.

The following morning, I was captured and was sent to Ardsmiur Prison where I found Murtagh and several other Scottish war prisoners. They were taken to me quickly and I became, sort of, their leader inside the prison. I was, once again, a leader and somehow, I think I found a new purpose for living. Over the next few years, we’d had different commanding officers who didna care for our living conditions until but some struck of fate, one Lord John Grey became our commanding officer.

He remembered me, somehow, and overtime, we’d sort of, developed a friendship that I put to use to the advantage of the prisoners. We’d eat dinner at his office, play chess from time to time and in return, he gave us better living environments. It was a good trade for me and the prisoners.

One time, a prisoner close to death, Duncan Kerr his name was, was thought to be in possession of the location of a treasure they called the Frenchman’s Gold. Problem was, he only spoke French and Gaelic, so I was called to translate for his behalf. He was speaking nonsense, mostly, spoke how the treasure was protected and cursed. He spoke of faeries and selkies. And then he mentioned of a white witch.

So one day, while we were walking in the fields, I escaped and swam to Selkie Island, thinking you’d be there. I know it’s silly but I had to take the chance and see it for myself, _mo duinne._ But alas, ye werna there but I saw the treasure. It wasna many but there were valuable wee gemstones that can be worth a lot of money. When I came back, John Grey captured me and I begged him to kill me, Sassenach. I couldna live without ye anymore, so I thought it better if I just ended my misery once and for all. Luckily, for all of us, he didna kill me or else, I wouldna be here with ye.

The prison was closing and everybody was being shipped to different areas for their pardon. Murtagh, I think, was sent to the colonies. As for me, John brought me to the Lake District at Helwater to work at the stables for Lord and Lady Dunsany – an old family friend of theirs.”

Jamie shifted slightly as he thought about how to continue his story. There was something big coming, Claire could sense it.

“Go on, just tell me” she urged. There was no point in avoiding it after all, they needed to let it out.

Jamie nodded. “John didn’t let the Dunsany’s know I was a Jacobite as their son was killed at the Battle of Culloden. However, Geneva, found out and began withholding my letters to Jenny and everyone at Lallybroch. She threatened to out me with her family that will surely bring me back to the prison and unable to send money at home.” He took a huge sip of his whiskey and Claire did too. “For her silence, she blackmailed me into bedding her.”

Claire, well prepared this time, did not move or breath and just continued to listen. She can handle this.

“You see,” Jamie continued. “she was to marry the Earl of Ellesmere. A grumpy, old man her parents arranged marriage for her for his wealth and she didna want to give her virginity to him. She asked me to come to her room in the night or else, I’d lose again whatever I had left. So I did what she asked of me.

It was only the one time but I must admit to ye that I took advantage of her offer and took what I could from her as well. After we did it, she told me she loved me but I told her that I just knew how to rouse her and it isna love that she felt for me. I grabbed her coat and handed it to her and then I left. The following morning, she was gone and three months later, marrit to the Lord Ellesmere.

A few months later, she visited back to Helwater” Jamie searched for Claire’s eyes and when they met, they did not lose contact – this was the hard part, Jamie knew and he needed to see her face when she hears it. “And she was pregnant, Claire. She was pregnant – with my son. Only John and Isobel, her sister, knew of what we did”

“You were sure the child was yours?”

“By the time she marrit, she was already with child. The timeline would justify so. Besides, he looks like me, Claire!” he said a little excitedly but seeing that Claire didn’t just share yet his enthusiasm, Jamie went back to his story.

“Geneva died at childbirth and I blame myself for it for I did not love her, Claire. The Lord Ellesmere threatened to kill the child as he knew he was a bastard and Geneva wasn’t the promised virgin coming into the marriage. I had to do something to save him, so I shot him. The Dunsanys, fortunately, took my side and thanked me for saving their grandson. Lady Dunsany offered me my freedom in exchange for their gratitude but I was earning a living and it gave me a chance to spend time with my son. His name is William Clarence Henry George, Viscount Dunsany, ninth earl of Ellesmere. They called him Willie.

I continued to work at the stables and eventually, I had the chance to teach Willie to ride horses and we grew close. However, as he grew older, his resemblance to me was beginning to show. Everyone was noticing it so I had to leave Helwater and leave him. He’s being taken care of Isobel and John Grey, who wed just after I left so they could look after Willie.”

They were well within half of the second bottle and the fire was running low. Jamie stood up and added a few more logs in the fire. “Just one more story then, I’ll be done.”

Her eyes shot up to him, hoping to see his face but his back was to her and his gaze was set upon the mantle.

“When I went back home to Lallybroch, I was back but I wasna home. Yer still gone, Jenny had bairns who didna recognize me. Wee Jamie was doing good as Laird of the estate and I was just there – just existing but having no purpose at all. I didna know what I was going to do with my life.

Jenny said that I should find a lass and get marrit again. Have the life I wanted with you with someone else. She thought it’s a nice idea to get me back living again. She pushed me to different lasses here and there but I always refused because how could I find a love that amounted to ours, Claire - that doesna exist anywhere but between us.

Then, last year, at Hogmany, two young lasses came to me and asked me to dance. Their names were Joan and Marsali MacKimmie. They are _Laoghaire’s_ daughters.

“No” a breathy reply came unbidden from Claire’s lips. That was the last of Claire’s resolve. She could handle Mary and that blackmailer Geneva but this woman, even after all this time, was after her husband. Why is every damn woman after her husband?

“You married Laoghaire?! Jesus Christ, Jamie! The woman tried to have me killed – didn’t you know that? At Crainsmuir?!”

“I DID NOT!” was Jamie’s sharp reply as he turned around to finally look at her, the situation shifting to unknown territory and Claire’s eyes were not at all understanding.

“WHAT? I’m sure I told you after the witch trial!”

“You said of no such thing! If you did, I would’ve seen to it that she got punished for her actions!” Both were heaving in anger but knew there was nothing to be done about it. He had said the truth and it was hers to decide on.

“Why, then? What convinced you to marry her?” Jamie was silent and she sensed that he was unsure whether to proceed on the topic. “Why did you marry her?” she asked again, voice calm but urgent. She didn’t want this to be screaming match but it’s taking Claire much control to put her anger at bay.

“The lasses. Laoghaire was a widow twice over and she needed someone to put a roof over the house, to be a father to Joan and Marsaali, someone to provide for her and I needed…something. I thought maybe being with her and the bairns would give me, at least, a bit of satisfaction of what our life could’ve been. But if ye must know, it wasna a happy marriage.”

Claire huffed in disagreement and Jamie shook his head. “I loved the lasses alright, Joan and Marsali but Laoghaire – Claire, there were times when we would go days or weeks without talking to each other. I didn’t mind because then we wouldn’t fight over these or that. Everytime I’d try to approach her, she’d shy away from my touch. I tried everything I knew how to please a woman but I couldna connect with her in any way.”

“Jamie, do you expect me to believe that the woman who has been pining for you for years, who finally got you as her husband, would suddenly turn away from you and your touch?”

“I only say true, Claire. I dinna know what happened with Laoghaire. Maybe it was her first husband, Hugh, or second husband, Simon – but she was afraid of me, Claire. And I dinna want to be around anyone who was afraid of my touch. So months after, I left for Edinburg and I became a printer. I was on my way back to Lallybroch for Jenny and I made a stop at the stones to talk to ye and then now, I’m here with you – where I’ve always wanted to be.”

Claire buried her eyes in her palms. “Is that everything?”

“Yes.” Jamie confirmed.

Claire stood and headed for the door but before she could leave, she turned and asked him one last question. “Did you love her? love them?”.

Jamie didn’t move from his place but he called to her, plead to her for one last time. ”I never loved anyone but you.” He said, plainly. “Claire, I couldna change the past or the life that I’ve lived but – I’ve only known one love in my life and that was with you.”

There was a silence that followed that was neither tension or calm and it was deeply unsettling. After a few beats, she spoke again. “I think we both need some time to process what we have just said to each other. I’ll be up in the room”

He nodded briefly then allowed her to leave.

-

Brianna briefly came into her room just before midnight to let her know that she and Roger had arrived. Coming into a brief consciousness, she realized that Jamie didn’t follow her up nor was he with her. She hadn’t had the heart to ask Bree if she saw Jamie as surely it will entail questions plus she Claire realized she was too tired to do or answer anything beyond informing her mother that she was home.

After she left, Claire realized that she couldn’t bring herself to sleep. The emptiness of the other side of her bed was too much to bear now that Jamie was the one occupying it once again.

_Jamie._

Three days since he arrived at her time and one night without him on her side already felt like a loss.                                                                           

_Jamie._

She thought about their conversation earlier in the night and all the details of his life he laid bare to her. The loss, the war, the cave, the prison, the blackmail, the son, and the second wife. She contemplated about the entirety of his life and thought if she could accept it and the answer came no one second later with such surety and honesty – yes.

Yes, because despite everything, she is still in love with Jamie and she was sure as hell that he loved her just as much back.

Yes, because she can respect and accept his past just like he did hers after Crainsmuir. All that matters to her is that he is in her future now and she on his.

Yes, because they were given this miracle of finally being together, defying the laws of space and time itself just because the universe knew they belonged together.

There will always be a difference with him back in her life – a peace, a contentment. He completed her and she him. They were meant to be for always and it would be a damn waste if they let this opportunity pass them by just because they couldn’t accept the life they’ve had when they thought either didn’t live.  No – the past will not take focus but rather their future. Now that they know everything, they can finally move on and forward again and that’s what she wants.

Question now is, is it the same that Jamie wants. This is their marriage after all and he has a choice to make too – and said question and answer cannot wait until the morning.

Grabbing her robe, she went down the reverend’s house and headed straight to the living room, thinking Jamie must’ve slept in the couch. She did ask for space but thought he'd follow her up a few minutes later when she did. Apparently, she wasn’t clear and they’re not as sync as they used to be, yet.

Slowly, she crept down the stairs until she reached the bottom, however, all she saw was an empty and clean room.

_Where is Jamie?_

She called out his name in a loud whisper, hoping he would magically appear.  No response.

She looked for him in the study, in the cellar, in the kitchen and even in the garden shed outback but he was nowhere to be seen.

A painful pang shot from the base of her feet up to her spine.        

_Could he have left her and headed back to the stones? Did he think she didn’t want him anymore? Did his noble ass self left to spare her feelings, yet again? No, he could not. He would definitely say goodbye to her if he decided that._

But her conscience fought back. 

 _Maybe he already did. Maybe he whispered his goodbye while she was sleeping just as he liked to do so when they were together_.

No, he couldn’t be gone. He wouldn’t leave her again. 

_But you might’ve given him reason to._

_No._ Claire continued to argue with herself.

 

“Jamie!” She called out again a little louder this time but still nothing. Panic was starting to rise from the pit of her stomach and tears were beginning to form in her eyes. At that moment she wanted – no, needed - nothing but Jamie in her arms, holding him, feeling him and loving him. Because, when it all came down to one thing, this was the life she was meant for, the life she wanted – to be with him and to love him, forever and always.

As she was about to run inside and wake Bree up, she caught a figure move at the corner of her eye. She found Jamie sleeping under a tree with only a blanket on him. She immediately ran to him and tackled him awake.

“Ooof! What’s the matter, Claire? Are ye alright?” he said sleepily.

“I couldn’t find you in the house. I thought you left. I thought you left me.” She said in a hurry as she clung herself to him tightly. “Don’t scare me like that again, Jamie.”

Jamie started to sit up and held her closer to him. “I’m sorry, Sassenach. I dinna know where to sleep. I thought ye wouldna want me in yer room and this was the only place I thought of sleeping.”

By this point, Claire freely let the tears fall. “I’m sorry, Jamie. I’m sorry.”

“What are ye sorry for, Sassenach?” Jamie chuckled, pulling back to see her tear-strained face.

“I don’t know” she shook her head vigorously. “I woke up and you weren’t there and when I came down, I couldn’t find you. I thought you went back...left me...I...” she trailed as she put mouth on him, not caring about her breath or his, and kissed him hard and long. Jamie equally matched her eagerness, pouring everything he had, hoping his lips would say the words that would comfort her.  

After a while, he pulled away and rested his forehead on hers. "I'll never leave ye again, I promise." 

Fresh tears fell from her eyes and Jamie was now, crying too. She reached up and wiped his tears away. “You come back to me, James Fraser. You always come back to me.” Claire confessed. “No matter what – No matter what happens, you come back to me. Knowing that you’re alive, I won’t handle losing you again. I love you. Damn the world and everything and everyone. It’s you and me, forever. Okay?”

Jamie caressed Claire’s cheek and focused his eyes on hers. “Aye. You and me, forever, Sassenach”

- 

Claire and Jamie stayed outside, a little too emotional to move back to the house just yet. It was getting colder but they spread Jamie’s blanket on them and they sat down, Jamie’s back to a tree, while Claire settled and cuddled between Jamie’s legs. He wrapped his arms on her and she clung to him.

They stayed there for a while, just enjoying the peace of the moment as the sound of the Scottish forest behind them lulled them to a calm place.

“What’s wrong?” Claire aired out suddenly. Jamie was confused at first but it must’ve been his deep sighs that made her ask.

“Do you want me to go?” Jamie ask bluntly.

He needed to know. They said a lot that night and it hurt for both of them. More than the 200-year distance, it was the fact that they lived such unhappy lives that broke his heart more and he didn’t want to add to Claire’s hurt if she couldn’t accept what he has revealed.

But then she came to him in the middle of the night and reaffirmed her commitment to him and it was a little confusing for him – did she want him or no? He just wanted answers and everything to be clear because if her peace of mind was at the cost of his leaving, then he would happily do it.

“I think I can go back through…” Jamie could feel Claire tense and he was sure she could feel him too“…I mean, I could still hear the stones screaming…”

Apparently, waiting was no option but of all the questions he could’ve inquired, he asked the most ridiculous one. “What are you talking about?” Claire asked.

“You and I, we know each other less than when we first wed and I might no longer be the man ye once knew.” He said plainly. “But I must know, Claire. Do you want me?”

Claire turned around and looked at Jamie, whose  beautiful viking face was still like a statue, awaiting for her answer. _Oh, dear lord, how she loved him._

She held her face in both her hands and said “Whoever you are, James Fraser – Yes, I do want you.” She felt him relax in her touch as his his tight hold on her slackened a bit. “All this has been confusing and frustrating, but it’s never been a question of whether I love you.” Claire heard him grunt a Scottish burr from both amusement and relief and she playfully slapped his arm. “What about you? How do you know what I’m like now? I could be a horrible person for all you know.”

“Suppose ye might be, at that. But d’ye know, Sassenach, I dinna think I care.” He replied.

“Neither do I.” she answered as she leaned in to kiss him again. “You’re mine, Jamie? Aren’t you?”

“I’ve always been yers, Sassenach.” He tenderly said. “And you?”

Claire smiled and replied, “Always.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just some extra A/N:  
> This was an extra long chapter and I hope you made it until the end :) 
> 
> When I first thought of the plot of this story, I knew I wanted to write the part where they let everything out and I also knew I wanted to write it in detail based on how I thought their conversation would go or how I wanted to expand their talk based on the show and books and thought about details they might've missed that I wanted to convey.
> 
> Halfway to writing it, I honestly doubted myself if I should do so since a lot of you readers have watched the show and know the books so rehashing this entire history might be a bore (I apologise in advance for this) but as I was re-reading it, I really wanted to push them into narrating the entire story again - so I did and wrote it all the way I could simply remember it. 
> 
> I might've missed some few details as well or focused too much on some but in my head, they needed a time to really get to know their lives before in order for them to really move forward now and now that I am done writing this chapter, I can move forward to more AU/domestic Fraser stuff happening which I am super excited now. 
> 
> I am so thankful for you reading and your support. If you have questions, feel free to ask and as always comments and suggestions are always welcome!
> 
> Add:   
> Thank you for the early reviews and comments! <3 Just to say that what ya'll be thinking might be right...
> 
> Up next, the Frasers go up to Lallybroch! :) #staytuned


	9. Revelations Continued

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short chapter to before the Frasers head up to Lallybroch.

Sitting by the tree with their arms wrapped tight around each other had been pure bliss after what had been an emotional night for Jamie and Claire.

Releasing 20 years of hurt and pain had taken a toll on them but nothing beats the satisfaction of finally being in the arms of the person you long for most in the world. After a brief while, they both agreed to head back inside and back to their room where they promptly fell asleep.

The following morning, they came down to their family having breakfast. Bree, Roger and Mrs. Graham were all in the table already starting with their food.

“Morning” Bree said. Pointing towards the table for them to join in.

Once they sat down and settled, Claire noticed Bree and Mrs. Graham kept looking wide-eyed at Roger.

“What is it?” Claire finally asked, saving them all the trouble.

“Ah,” Roger heaved a sigh, put down his utensils and went for his briefcase. He pulled out a paper and handed it to the couple. “I hope you don’t mind. It was Mrs. Graham and I’s idea, thought we’d sort it for you guys since we had the time and we know people around. It wasn’t hard to come by…We thought it will help to get him all the other things he might need.” He trailed off, just looking at Jamie and Claire’s speechless faces.

“Roger, this is, uhm…” Claire began, stumbling out the words, then finally looked at him with tears nearly falling from her eyes.

“Thank ye.” Jamie finished for both of them. “This is above and beyond for what you’ve given me and my family.”

Mrs. Graham and Roger used their connections to give Jamie a copy of his “ _birth certificate_ ”, making him a legitimate citizen of this century. Moreover, they knew Jamie, at least, needed that document to get all of the other IDs and documents he will need in this time.

“Did you know about this?” Claire turned to their daughter who was openly chuckling at their loss for words.

Brianna smiled and nodded at this, “Roger and I thought about it when we were preparing for Da’s birthday. I hope it was a wonderful surprise”

“It is.” Claire immediately replied. “I honestly hadn’t thought about all this, about Jamie’s legal situation here…” she trailed off again.

“There’s just one document we couldn’t get though” Roger hesitatingly said.

“What is it?” Claire asked for the second time that morning.

“There is no record anywhere of yer marriage from before and after the _current_ war, we thought it be harder to justify to our friends why its such if we tried to _get_ one for you. It’s not hard to remedy though, for yer situation.

Claire looked at Jamie as he reached out and took the document from her hands. She was relieved that in the three days Jamie has been back or even after in their years apart, Jamie can read her as plain as an open book. He already knew what she couldn’t say.

_We’ll talk about it later._

“Thank ye again.” Jamie said in final.  

“It’s no bother and we’re happy to do it. After everything else ye’ve been through together, ye deserve this chance.” Mrs. Graham said as she grabbed another bannock. “Now, eat up and we’ve got some errands to do”

-

It took all day but when Jamie, Claire, and Mrs. Graham, arrived home, they had acquired a passport and ID card for Jamie. The question of Claire and Jamie’s civil status were, thankfully, not brought up by either of them and that was fine.

By the time they got home, Jamie excused himself to freshen up before dinner and Claire found their daughter by the fireplace in the study, helping herself to a small dram.

“Oh, you’re here” she said surprisingly.

“Just got home”

“Da?”

“Upstairs.”

She offered Claire the glass which she took as Brianna poured herself another and they settled by the large chairs.

“When?” Brianna asked.

“When what?”

“When did you know that you loved Da and you wouldn’t go back?”

Claire looked at the fire and chuckled. “Give me a minute to rack my brain.”

Bree raised an eyebrow in a silent, questioning “ _why_ ”.

“No, it’s not a question of whether or not I love him. The timeline is just a little complicated - on my end at least.”

“Why so?”

“Well, if you ask your Da that question, he can answer you right away.” Another hearty laugh between mother and daughter filled the room.

“I think it was a gradual and unexpected thing for me.” Claire began. “When I went through the stones, I was scared and confused. Then I met Jamie and he became my only friend in the Castle. Your Da was sneaky though. I knew there were lots of times he’d spend time with me just because or I’ll find him looking at me out of nowhere. It started as little innocent things but I knew overtime that he had a crush on me. I tried to deny it or push it off as friendly, tried to not get too attached to him as I still planned to get back to my own time and to Frank as well. But that was until we were kind of forced and _arranged_ to be married.”

Bree could see the glint in her mother’s eyes as she recounted this part of the story. There were faces of her that was new to her and Bree thought that maybe that’s what being _in love_ looked like.

“Our first night together, well, it was…ugh, _mandatory_ …to be together. But after that, well…” Claire blushed and shrugged pertaining to the obvious.

“Mama, keep it PG” Bree joked while taking a sip.

“All I am saying is… despite my reluctance to still admit my feelings for Jamie at that time, and my plans still to return to my time even after we were married, a part of me enjoyed being with Jamie, enjoyed being married to Jamie - and not just physically, mind you. He knew my mind was at battle with everything going on but he just had a way that made me feel at ease all the time, whether it was with a kiss, a hug, a touch in the hand, or giving me my own space. He just knew and I think I’ve never been with anyone who knew me better than I knew myself, not even Frank. Again, we go back to the little things. And despite my strong independence, I found myself relying so much to Jamie and slowly, I just couldn’t imagine life without him. After that, I knew I had loved him more than I ever loved anyone and it was enough to keep me in that time. As long as I was with Jamie, I was okay and that simply was it.”

“But that doesn’t _really_ answer my question.” Bree insisted.

Claire thought a little bit more. “The first time he took me back to the stones - that was when I knew my heart, finally admitted to myself that my heart was with him. He tried to send me back but I didn’t go. I spent a long time in front of that stone, thinking of every possible scenario, tried to be logical and reasonable about this life changing decision. But at the end of the day, everything led back to Jamie and I chose him. Shortly after that was the first time I told him I loved him, which was at Lallybroch.”

Bree nodded in understanding as Claire took her fill of the whiskey.                                                                                   

“Frank was a love in my life - but Jamie is and will always be the love of my life. We are meant to be together. That’s the only explanation I have for _my ability_ to travel through time – it was so I could find him, love him, and for us to just be together.” she said straight and plain. “So…” Claire toyed with her left ring finger and slid off the gold band she’s been wearing the past 30 years and handed it to her daughter. “Jamie never asked me to take it off because he knew Frank was an important part of my life – but he isn’t anymore, he hasn’t been for a long time. I hope you understand.” 

Bree took the ring and held it close for inspection. _From F to C. Always._

“Why are you giving it to me?” she asked.

“You loved Daddy, I think he would appreciate you having it, plus, it seemed a much better idea to give it to you than throw it away. You can do whatever you want to it and it will be fine by me.” Her mother allowed.

“Thank you, Mama”

“You’re welcome”

A moment of silence passed through and Claire knew more questions were coming from her daughter. It the first time in a few days that they’ve had a moment to themselves after Jamie had arrived. They did promise each other honesty, too, back at the stones and she plans to follow through with that. She was ready to tell everything, but she thought if her daughter was ready to hear it.

“Were you and daddy ever happy?” The question put Claire out of her reverie and she looked directly at her daughter’s eyes as she answered.

“We were happy raising you together.”

“That’s not what I asked.”

“Do you really want to know?”

“All the truth is coming out now, might as well blow it all out in the open”

“Can you handle more?”

Brianna laughed and shrugged. “I don’t know but I’d rather know now than be surprised again later”

“Alright,” Claire said as she took another good sip of her drink. “First and important thing to know is that Frank loved you with all his heart. You were his greatest joy, his proudest accomplishment.” Claire paused and thought if she should go on but Brianna was looking straight at her, she couldn’t stop now.

“After the war, we thought about our options about having a family and he was sure that adoption was not for him. He wanted a child of his own blood and flesh. I was not happy with that decision but I was young, then, and he was my husband and what his last say goes. When I came back and told him everything, he still wanted me back despite knowing for a fact that my heart was no longer with him. A part of me believes he wanted us back together because he truly did love me and another part of me thinks he just wanted to continue to look what _society_ deemed the right thing for us to be. I withheld the pregnancy until the last moment. He was happy at first but when he slowly realized that I was, indeed, with another man, he almost tried to hit me but he held himself. After much thought and counsel, he still took me back with the condition that we raise you as his own and forget Jamie.”

“Why did you agree to his terms then?”

“Because I promised Jamie. I promised that you and I will be well taken care of by someone who loved me, someone who would’ve loved you. That is all he wanted for us.”

We moved to Boston and we tried to be together but we couldn’t. Most of it is on me because even though I kept my promise to not speak of Jamie to Frank but I think he knew that Jamie was still constantly on my mind. Eventually, we just agreed to stay together, legally, but have separate lives. He had his work, I was in school. We supported each other, for old times sake, at least.”

“And you?”

“I must admit that it was difficult going through the pregnancy. I was in a new place with no friends or family. Frank felt the distance between us, I was heartbroken for Jamie…it was not a happy time until you were born. When I held you in my arms, I have found my life and purpose again. You are the child Jamie and I badly wanted and I see him in you everyday. He made me go because he loved you and we lived because I loved him enough to keep my promise. Believe me, if there was a way to _stay_ , we would’ve done it in a second.”

“Why didn’t you?”

“Faith” she huffed, unwilling to look at Bree’s eyes. “And Jamie” she followed. “I promised him that I’ll keep you safe. That’s why we decided that I had to go back to this time. If I stayed there after the Battle of Culloden, I am almost most certain that we wouldn’t survive. Every traitor got hunted down and killed throughout the highlands and they will not know I am pregnant for it was too early for me to show. They will have no mercy.”

“But Jamie survived” Bree followed somberly.

“He did” Claire, not really the religious type, suddenly found herself saying a silent prayer of thanks to a higher being for bringing him here in her time and to have her daughter too.

“And Faith? What about her?” Bree asked, hoping to know more about her older sister. Claire just briefly touched the topic in their storytelling in the past week. She understood that it was – _is_ – painful for her mother to relieve that memory.

“We lived in a very unpredictable and chaotic time. We were Scottish socialites in France, doing all these deceitful things to save a war from happening. In the process, we’d made enemies who tried to harm us. Then the war happened and we were in battles. Everything just went from bad to worse so quickly. Just the stress of it all, I think, was what made us lose her. It was beyond heartbreaking. I was ready to die.”

Bree tried to hide the surprise she felt on her mother’s blunt revelation.

“Yes, it was that intense. I was mad at your father, mad at the world, mad at God. You should thank one Louise de la Tour for keeping me alive until your Da found me.”

“Da found you?”

Claire shrugged and shook her head. “There’s a lot more to tell, my love, but I’ll be enjoying this conversation more if both Jamie and I tell it to you”

“Speaking of Da, are you going up to Lallybroch tomorrow?”

“Yes. You’ll follow us the day later after you’ve finished your class?”

“Yes. Already have Roger and Mrs. Graham to come with me too”

“Good. I think the food is ready” smelling the aroma of a hearty dinner down the hall. “We should head out” Claire stood and offered a hand to her daughter who quickly took it.

-

Jamie was asleep when Claire entered their room. His traveling through the stones can be compared a little bit as jetlag as the man acclimatized to this time. Four days he’s been in her time and she still can’t believe their luck.

Sensing her, Jamie, with still eyes closed, reached out a hand which she quickly took as she tucked herself in under his arms. They both hummed in contentment at the same time.

“Was it a good talk?” Jamie asked.

“You always know do you?” Claire funnily retorted, squeezing herself closer.

“Well, there is only one person I know that can tear you away from me that long and I can smell her scent on you.” Jamie smiled as he buried him face in her curls.

“It was a good talk but next time I want us both to tell it. It’ll be a good bonding experience for us.”

Jamie gave a sleepy Scottish grunt. “I canna wait to go to Lallybroch, Sassenach, and see what ye’ve done wi’ it.”

“I can’t wait to go back to Lallybroch with you.”

“Tomorrow, then.”

“Tomorrow. But now, you have to get up because dinner is ready”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! This is just a short chapter with two scenarios in mind that I've always wanted to write. First, I'd always imagined Mrs. Graham and Roger would really do things out of their way to give the Frasers their much needed chance and second, I'd always imagined Brianna and Claire having a moment just the two of them to really talk and quickly sort things out. I felt that it was important to establish these relationships and connections these way and really show the forging bond within this family and the important people around them. 
> 
> I am so excited for the Frasers to head up to Lallybroch and for Claire and Jamie to finally (!) have some alone time together! 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading. I know its takes me a while to update but rest assured, this story is constantly on my mind.
> 
> Your comments and suggestions are always appreciated and if you want to send a prompt for our lovely family, please feel free to send them!


End file.
